oneonewasaracecar
Gold Meritorious Patron
If your org received a package of toilet paper with David Miscavige's face would you use it?
POLL - Ass Ethics - Toilet Paper with David Miscavige's face.
- Thread starter oneonewasaracecar
- Start date
Panda Termint
Cabal Of One
I voted "certainly not" but do disclaim that "desperate times call for desperate measures". 
Cornelius Bigot
Patron with Honors
I was never in, but i'd give DM's face a crack. Sure.
Jump
Operating teatime
Cornelius Bigot
Patron with Honors
Nice to see you do give a shit.
From the heart of my bottom.
anonomog
Gold Meritorious Patron
No way.
The roll is half sized.
The oompa loompa fake orange tan stain the rear.
Every so often it leaps off the roll and punches you in the face.
It tells other people in the house what happens when you are in the bathroom.
It makes the toothpaste and shampoo live in the garage and no one can find them.
It automatically installs a credit card machine and only dispenses, for the right donation.
Cats have had to go into long term therapy with prozac after playing with it once.
The roll is half sized.
The oompa loompa fake orange tan stain the rear.
Every so often it leaps off the roll and punches you in the face.
It tells other people in the house what happens when you are in the bathroom.
It makes the toothpaste and shampoo live in the garage and no one can find them.
It automatically installs a credit card machine and only dispenses, for the right donation.
Cats have had to go into long term therapy with prozac after playing with it once.
Little David
Gold Meritorious Patron
I'm not sure why but this poll made me think of David and Laurisse:
It occurs to me that 1-1 might be onto something here.
How much would it cost to have a wholesale batch of cheap toilet paper made up with a facsimile of DM's face? I'm not sure how much a "batch" is, but if someone brought it to my attention that DM toilet paper was being sold on eBay---
I'm retired and living in what some would call Spartan accommodations (I don't, but some would) on a very modest fixed income, but I would spend five or ten bucks a month to send personalized TP to FCDC. My thought is to include some kind of compassionate message with the anonymous gift, nothing rancorous or derisive--just something to let them know that I've been where they are and know their needs. And let them make what they will of the face on the gift.
I would bet good money--and I'm not a betting man--that a significant number of ESMBers here would do the same thing, both here in WDC, and all across the country. Anyone who wants to invest in having a huge batch of DMTP made up will get his investment back on eBay, and might even turn a profit. I have no idea what a minimum wholesale batch would cost, but I find Republican & Democratic Party icons, and Obama TP on eBay for around $5.00/roll with shipping. I assume it's made in huge lots, so smaller orders may cost more--but I would commit to buying up to $20 worth if DMTP appears on eBay. I'll go so far as to commit myself to $50 worth if nobody else in the DC Metropolitan Area is moved to join me in this act of compassion for the still-Ins. Because I'm that sure some Ex out here will be.
Now think about it: Half a dozen rolls of DM paper each Org, each week, showing up at Orgs all across the country. Think of the destitute staff who might be conflicted between necessity and "Can I get this past the E-meter? Can I claim I considered it utilitarian and not disrespectful?"
Necessity is the mother of invention. Who knows what justifying thought processes might be engendered--like, "Well--this is the guy who won't let my Org keep enough money to buy TP!" or "The Org would have enough money for TP if Uplines didn't make us piss away the budget mailing to dead addresses."
That, btw, is a message I might even include with my compassionate note. "I know your budget is too drained for luxuries like this after you spend $[_x_] each month mailing promo to mostly dead addresses...I understand, I've been there, I know how hard it is to divert budget money from useless pursuits to practical applications..."...All the while, not saying their Uplines are incompetent, just setting the context where it's bound to slip into their thinking...and possibly even into their conversation, at least until some KRs get written up.
But will they use the TP or not? My guess? They won't place it in the toilet holders, but I'd bet it would wind up stashed away somewhere available for somebody to use, even if whoever opens the mail makes it his/her private stash. But word will get out, and other staffers will find it and use it.
And even if it gets tossed in the dumpster every week when it arrives, how long before some staffer notices it in there and retrieves it? Seriously, staffers who are paid $30/week and are always short on any and all supplies must have awareness of what's in dumpsters, every time they visit to throw something in. So just tossing it won't keep it from being used. (Btw--for those of you who don't know, even TP that has been rained on is porous enough to dry out in the sun. I'd bet some staffers know that.) So any "ethical" staffer who wants to keep DM from being "disrespected" would have to make a special effort to dispose of the gift DMTP.
Now think a little farther: Weeks of anonymous DMTP gifts arriving every week at Orgs across the country--for only a few dollars from participating compassionate ESMBers --and the words gets out. People notice. I mean, those few people in The Church who don't have to worry about TP when they visit the loo. And my guess is that someone will feel the need to Handle the Situation and do a classic foot-bullet on it: Still guessing, but set some executive order or policy or some Word from Above dictating what is to be done to dispose of the DMTP--respectfully of course-- when it arrives. And I'm guessing Ethics officers will begin including on-the-cans questions about what staff members do for TP. Wonder how many Rock Slams that would generate?
Whatever is Decreed from Above might actually stop the DMTP from being used, but it will also bring even more attention to why the Word from Above had to be Decreed in the first place: NO TOILET PAPER in the Orgs. Ever! Except during special events when Those from Above are expected to be present.
(It just now occurred to me that people who grew up in Scientology may not even know how abnormal it is for office restrooms not to have toilet paper! After nearly 40 years, I had completely forgotten how that lack was taken for granted in FCDC.)
So even if we can't supply the poor staff peons with DMTP for very long, we might at least incite and maintain a little long-term resentment ("entheda" in $ciospeak) in the work environment and hasten some of the more cognizant staff into realizing how little the Upper Echelons care for their welfare. Because, y'know what? The one thing that won't happen is that the Upper Echelons won't do anything to provide for TP in the Org bathrooms. There won't be any Mailing List Updates or anything else to free up $$$ to buy useful supplies, not just because the TP scarcity was brought to Upper Echelons' attention. There will be action to Stop DM Being Disrespected, and everything else will be Business as Usual.
It might actually move some staffers to Blow months or even years earlier than they would have otherwise, given a long enough time of knowing that DMTP is being disposed of every week while the Org still spends more budget money every week mailing to dead addresses than a year's supply of TP would cost...something I might tactfully point out in sympathetic notes early on. This act of compassion might possibly save years out of some people's lives...aside from just thinking of DM's face being rubbed where appropriate.
The fact is that I've been toying with ideas for a long time, trying to think of what kind of Act of Compassion might actually help make life easier for poor Org staffers, without "flowing power" to the Church it$elf. I know you can't give them money-- it would be like giving a wino or junkie money that just goes right to a liquor store or dealer or the Church and the wino/junkie/staffer is no better off. This idea of 1-1's (oneonewasaracecar's) struck me as what I was looking for: A small beginning to undermine the Church's grip by showing some unconditional compassion to its staff; and from an anonymous source the Church can't attack: Care packages in the mail, perhaps with brownies or something along with the DMTP. If I could get names, I'd address them to individual staffers, to make it clear it wasn't a gift to the Org and therefore automatically under the control of Higher-ups to dispense or discard.
Now I've been writing this off the top of my head, not thoroughly thought out or thru, but...whaddaya think? Is this an idea worth pursuing? Is this worth suggesting in a separate thread? 'Cause, really, this DMTP thread is too good to derail.
oneonewasaracecar
Gold Meritorious Patron
It was a serious idea put forth in a jovial way. There would be a conflict between one's basic needs and the need to keep your ethics in.It occurs to me that 1-1 might be onto something here.
How much would it cost to have a wholesale batch of cheap toilet paper made up with a facsimile of DM's face? I'm not sure how much a "batch" is, but if someone brought it to my attention that DM toilet paper was being sold on eBay---
I'm retired and living in what some would call Spartan accommodations (I don't, but some would) on a very modest fixed income, but I would spend five or ten bucks a month to send personalized TP to FCDC. My thought is to include some kind of compassionate message with the anonymous gift, nothing rancorous or derisive--just something to let them know that I've been where they are and know their needs. And let them make what they will of the face on the gift.
I would bet good money--and I'm not a betting man--that a significant number of ESMBers here would do the same thing, both here in WDC, and all across the country. Anyone who wants to invest in having a huge batch of DMTP made up will get his investment back on eBay, and might even turn a profit. I have no idea what a minimum wholesale batch would cost, but I find Republican & Democratic Party icons, and Obama TP on eBay for around $5.00/roll with shipping. I assume it's made in huge lots, so smaller orders may cost more--but I would commit to buying up to $20 worth if DMTP appears on eBay. I'll go so far as to commit myself to $50 worth if nobody else in the DC Metropolitan Area is moved to join me in this act of compassion for the still-Ins. Because I'm that sure some Ex out here will be.
Now think about it: Half a dozen rolls of DM paper each Org, each week, showing up at Orgs all across the country. Think of the destitute staff who might be conflicted between necessity and "Can I get this past the E-meter? Can I claim I considered it utilitarian and not disrespectful?"
Necessity is the mother of invention. Who knows what justifying thought processes might be engendered--like, "Well--this is the guy who won't let my Org keep enough money to buy TP!" or "The Org would have enough money for TP if Uplines didn't make us piss away the budget mailing to dead addresses."
That, btw, is a message I might even include with my compassionate note. "I know your budget is too drained for luxuries like this after you spend $[_x_] each month mailing promo to mostly dead addresses...I understand, I've been there, I know how hard it is to divert budget money from useless pursuits to practical applications..."...All the while, not saying their Uplines are incompetent, just setting the context where it's bound to slip into their thinking...and possibly even into their conversation, at least until some KRs get written up.
But will they use the TP or not? My guess? They won't place it in the toilet holders, but I'd bet it would wind up stashed away somewhere available for somebody to use, even if whoever opens the mail makes it his/her private stash. But word will get out, and other staffers will find it and use it.
And even if it gets tossed in the dumpster every week when it arrives, how long before some staffer notices it in there and retrieves it? Seriously, staffers who are paid $30/week and are always short on any and all supplies must have awareness of what's in dumpsters, every time they visit to throw something in. So just tossing it won't keep it from being used. (Btw--for those of you who don't know, even TP that has been rained on is porous enough to dry out in the sun. I'd bet some staffers know that.) So any "ethical" staffer who wants to keep DM from being "disrespected" would have to make a special effort to dispose of the gift DMTP.
Now think a little farther: Weeks of anonymous DMTP gifts arriving every week at Orgs across the country--for only a few dollars from participating compassionate ESMBers --and the words gets out. People notice. I mean, those few people in The Church who don't have to worry about TP when they visit the loo. And my guess is that someone will feel the need to Handle the Situation and do a classic foot-bullet on it: Still guessing, but set some executive order or policy or some Word from Above dictating what is to be done to dispose of the DMTP--respectfully of course-- when it arrives. And I'm guessing Ethics officers will begin including on-the-cans questions about what staff members do for TP. Wonder how many Rock Slams that would generate?
Whatever is Decreed from Above might actually stop the DMTP from being used, but it will also bring even more attention to why the Word from Above had to be Decreed in the first place: NO TOILET PAPER in the Orgs. Ever! Except during special events when Those from Above are expected to be present.
(It just now occurred to me that people who grew up in Scientology may not even know how abnormal it is for office restrooms not to have toilet paper! After nearly 40 years, I had completely forgotten how that lack was taken for granted in FCDC.)
So even if we can't supply the poor staff peons with DMTP for very long, we might at least incite and maintain a little long-term resentment ("entheda" in $ciospeak) in the work environment and hasten some of the more cognizant staff into realizing how little the Upper Echelons care for their welfare. Because, y'know what? The one thing that won't happen is that the Upper Echelons won't do anything to provide for TP in the Org bathrooms. There won't be any Mailing List Updates or anything else to free up $$$ to buy useful supplies, not just because the TP scarcity was brought to Upper Echelons' attention. There will be action to Stop DM Being Disrespected, and everything else will be Business as Usual.
It might actually move some staffers to Blow months or even years earlier than they would have otherwise, given a long enough time of knowing that DMTP is being disposed of every week while the Org still spends more budget money every week mailing to dead addresses than a year's supply of TP would cost...something I might tactfully point out in sympathetic notes early on. This act of compassion might possibly save years out of some people's lives...aside from just thinking of DM's face being rubbed where appropriate.
The fact is that I've been toying with ideas for a long time, trying to think of what kind of Act of Compassion might actually help make life easier for poor Org staffers, without "flowing power" to the Church it$elf. I know you can't give them money-- it would be like giving a wino or junkie money that just goes right to a liquor store or dealer or the Church and the wino/junkie/staffer is no better off. This idea of 1-1's (oneonewasaracecar's) struck me as what I was looking for: A small beginning to undermine the Church's grip by showing some unconditional compassion to its staff; and from an anonymous source the Church can't attack: Care packages in the mail, perhaps with brownies or something along with the DMTP. If I could get names, I'd address them to individual staffers, to make it clear it wasn't a gift to the Org and therefore automatically under the control of Higher-ups to dispense or discard.
Now I've been writing this off the top of my head, not thoroughly thought out or thru, but...whaddaya think? Is this an idea worth pursuing? Is this worth suggesting in a separate thread? 'Cause, really, this DMTP thread is too good to derail.
After reading your message, I would probably suggest that DMs face would be a waste of toilet paper.
Maybe "Your doubts are valid," "You have more friends on the outside than the inside" "Do you really want to do this forever?" etc.
There is this website http://www.justtoiletpaper.com/customnew.shtml that does small ... runs ... of toilet paper.
TP is usually manufactured in one continuous batch.
Since there are already TP brands with 1- and even 4-color prints on it, it shouldn't be too hard to exchange the printing-rollers into new ones with the face of DM on 'em.
But, expect costs of of approximately 30 grand for the creation of each of these new rollers.
Therefore: Very funny and creative idea, but not economically viable.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=npvKGnVjoFM
Last edited:
oneonewasaracecar
Gold Meritorious Patron
From my link you can get 10 rolls for $100. Far more expensive than regular paper, but worth the price if it works. I'm sure there are better prices out there.TP is usually manufactured in one continuous batch.
Since there are already TP brands with 1- and even 4-color prints on it, it shouldn't be too hard to exchange the printing-rollers into new ones with the face of DM on 'em.
But, expect costs of of approximately 30 grand for the creation of each of these new rollers.
Therefore: Very funny and creative idea, but not economically viable.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=npvKGnVjoFM
Attachments
Interesting! Too bad their website doesn't say which kind of printing-technology they use. Based on logical assumptions and educated guesses, I'd say it must be either sieve-print or ink-jet technology. Both would be fit for up to a few hundred rolls (and the initial setup pricing would be OK for either of 'em), but that batch size would be terribly inadequate for industrial production and that's where my price estimation comes from.
Granted, there were some significant technology changes underway, since I last worked in a machine factory building professional mass-printing machines, so my information might be a bit outdated. But still: Ink-jets or sieves (the more likely solution) probably wouldn't hold up long enough in an industrial manufacturing process.
A.K. Myers
Patron with Honors
I have posted this image before!
Gizmo
Rabble Rouser
I have posted this image before!
dm 's face goes to shit.
In Der Fuehrer's Face?
When der fuehrer says we is de master race
We heil heil right in der fueher's face
Not to love der fuehrer is a great disgrace
So we heil heil right in der fuehrer's face
When COB says we own the world and space
We wipe wipe right in DM's face
When Herr Davey says they'll never bomb this place
We wipe wipe right in Davey face
Are we not the supermen, OT pure supermen
Ja we are the supermen (super duper supermen)
Is this upstat land so good
Would you leave it if you could
Ja this Theta land is good
We would leave it if we could
We bring the world to order
Heil DM's world to order
Everyone of DB race
Will love der fuehrer's face
When we bring to the world this order
When der fuehrer says we is de master race
We heil heil right in der fueher's face
Not to love der fuehrer is a great disgrace
So we heil heil right in der fuehrer's face
When COB says we own the world and space
We wipe wipe right in DM's face
When Herr Davey says they'll never bomb this place
We wipe wipe right in Davey face
Are we not the supermen, OT pure supermen
Ja we are the supermen (super duper supermen)
Is this upstat land so good
Would you leave it if you could
Ja this Theta land is good
We would leave it if we could
We bring the world to order
Heil DM's world to order
Everyone of DB race
Will love der fuehrer's face
When we bring to the world this order
oneonewasaracecar
Gold Meritorious Patron
It's much more expensive than regular shit tickets, and 10 rolls would last an org for a day, maybe two, and an individual, for a week, depending on precisely how shitty the org is.Interesting! Too bad their website doesn't say which kind of printing-technology they use. Based on logical assumptions and educated guesses, I'd say it must be either sieve-print or ink-jet technology. Both would be fit for up to a few hundred rolls (and the initial setup pricing would be OK for either of 'em), but that batch size would be terribly inadequate for industrial production and that's where my price estimation comes from.
Granted, there were some significant technology changes underway, since I last worked in a machine factory building professional mass-printing machines, so my information might be a bit outdated. But still: Ink-jets or sieves (the more likely solution) probably wouldn't hold up long enough in an industrial manufacturing process.
Remember, even keeping the paper for yourself it a suppressive act. Wiping your ass with SP (Suppressive Paper), is one step out of COfS.
Anyone who is on the brink of leaving is potentially one wipe away from blowing (and here come the cheap puns).