The Magic Armadillo Apologizes to Everyone!

[Alanzo]

I'm sorry you people are so fucked up in the head.

Anyone who even mentions that you should be a Magic Armadillo just like me causes you to lash out and attack me -because you are so fucked up in the head!

That's because you are so fucked up in the head and not because there is actually no such thing as a Magic Armadillo!

 

[ChuckNorrisCutsMyLawn]

I'm sorry you people are so fucked up in the head.

Anyone who even mentions that you should be a Magic Armadillo just like me causes you to lash out and attack me -because you are so fucked up in the head!

That's because you are so fucked up in the head and not because there is actually no such thing as a Magic Armadillo!

Don't let them get to you, they are just envious of your Armadilloness.

They are not capable of understanding such heightened states of enlightenment.

To deny such heightened states of Armadilloness, or to spend time disproving them is a Spiritual Dead End.

I also pity them.

 

[EP - Ethics Particle]

Blatant Bubble Bursting!

I'm sorry...

...snip...

....there is actually no such thing as a Magic Armadillo!

My faith is shattered beyond beleif an i done d-sended inter GREEF! Yer wurst dan a Grinch Stole on Xmas, 'lonzo!

Dig yersef a hole and git in it!

EP

 

[SchwimmelPuckel]

I don't get it! - You're claiming to be attacked?

It's like you're completely flat and claimning to have been steamrollered!

That would be outrageous! - Being completely flat like that! - Why would you claim such an outrageous thing?

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

Dear Mr. Alonzo Armadillo,

You really owe me another much bigger apology for invalidating the reality of the time I psychically tele-transported an Armadillo a considerable distance away.

Of all people, I am shocked and saddened that YOU invalidated my OT powers and tried to publicly humiliate me.

But, the final betrayal and 'straw that broke the Commodore's back' was that threatening letter I received today from your lawyer, which stated in part:

"...your failure to yield at a clearly marked pedestrian crosswalk, at which time your automobile struck one Abraham Goldfinkel (aka Armadillo-Abe) the Uncle of my client Mr. Alonzo Armadillo. The video surveillance at the intersection revealed that your approach speed was in excess of 100 mph and Abe never knew what hit him before being 'tele-transported a considerable distance away'. Compounding the tragedy was your bizarre behavior at the scene of the collision--talking very loudly on your cellphone while bragging to everyone that you were getting a telephonic 'accident assist from Tom Cruise.' Even if true, it is hard to imagine any scenario under which a first responder would be ministering to YOU, an uninjured perpetrator, while Uncle Abe's comatose body was left on the pavement unattended some 30 yards away. It was also not appreciated that you kept yelling 'That's it, everyone muster up to give their wins on my magic OT miracle!' My client Alonzo Armadillo is seeking damages in the amount of $1,000,000 in order to cover the costs of Uncle Abe's funeral and other reimbursement of Bridge actions done to fly ruds on the enturbulation you have put on his lines. ​

Rather than attack me , I suggest that you use your theta and try my OT techniques so that you can one day join myself, Ron and Abe at Target 2.

ML,

Billy Blowdown
OT to like the zillionth power, for sure.

 

[Alanzo]

Dear Mr. Alonzo Armadillo,

You really owe me another much bigger apology for invalidating the reality of the time I psychically tele-transported an Armadillo a considerable distance away.

Of all people, I am shocked and saddened that YOU invalidated my OT powers and tried to publicly humiliate me.

But, the final betrayal and 'straw that broke the Commodore's back' was that threatening letter I received today from your lawyer, which stated in part:

Rather than attack me , I suggest that you use your theta and try my OT techniques so that you can one day join myself, Ron and Abe at Target 2.

ML,

Billy Blowdown
OT to like the zillionth power, for sure.

I can walk through walls, drive my car through other cars, and squeeze my car into spaces that it should never fit into.

I'm not going to show you my powers because those who need proof can't look.

And so my proof to you wouldn't do any good anyway.

Because you are so fucked up in the head.

Whereas I, the Magic Armadillo, am the Magic Armadillo I always dreamed you should be.

 

[Alanzo]

I don't get it! - You're claiming to be attacked?

It's like you're completely flat and claimning to have been steamrollered!

That would be outrageous! - Being completely flat like that! - Why would you claim such an outrageous thing?

You are the worst of all the failed-purpose losers on this natterboard.

Your attacks on me have been ferociously un-called for and completely out-of-line. But, as a Magic Armadillo, my ARC is so high for the little people who are so fucked up in the head like you, I take all this in stride.

Because - even though this may be a bit above your reality - I've been in comm with Ron.

 

[exsomessenger]

can you give Ron a message for me? his dry cleaning is ready for pick up. thanks.

 

[Smurf]

I'm sorry you people are so fucked up in the head.

Anyone who even mentions that you should be a Magic Armadillo just like me causes you to lash out and attack me -because you are so fucked up in the head!

Hey, Alanzo, how many Mexicans does it take to eat an armadillo? Three.. one to eat it, and two to watch for cars.

 

[exsomessenger]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LrLLdNuOESk&feature=related :confused2:

 

[AnonyMary]

Being The Magic Armadillo means never having to say you're sorry.....

 

[AnonKat]

The Religious Affiliation of Comic Book Character

http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Armadillo.html

The Religious Affiliation of Comic Book Character
Antonio Rodriguez
Armadillo
of the Unlimited Class Wrestling Federation, Ultimate Fighting League and the Rangers

 

[byte301]

Alanzo, I'll accept your lame apology when my winning lotto ticket arrives.

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

I can walk through walls, drive my car through other cars, and squeeze my car into spaces that it should never fit into. I'm not going to show you my powers because those who need proof can't look.And so my proof to you wouldn't do any good anyway.Because you are so fucked up in the head.Whereas I, the Magic Armadillo, am the Magic Armadillo I always dreamed you should be.

Well I think your miracle powers are just...um...miraculous!

Thus, can I safely assume that your supernatural-ness-powers can easily blow any case charge caused by my routing your Uncle Abe to Ron's Research Org? So no law suit, right?

I am very keyed out that your lawyer was only threatening to standardly sue me to harrass, bankrupt and shudder me into silence (not really sue me like sp wogs).

That is so theta that you are following Ron's policies! For a moment there I actually thought you were suing me to harm me.

ML,

Billy Blowdown

 

[degraded being]

And I am superior too, so naturally I totally support the sweet nice geniune Alanzo. How dare the down tone riff raff around here ask him to talk sanity!
We both know don't we that you should look at yourself and not Alanzo and that having heard this from the illustrious Degarded Being you should Shut The Fuck Up.

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

!!! OT SUCCESS STORY !!!

Today I was late for course and there were no remaining parking spaces.
I remembered what Ron said about not going into agreement with
MEST stops. And since I am on the PDC Course I decided to try
out my postulates and closed my eyes and that's when I
heard a giant CRASHING-CRUNCHING noise as my car
went out of agreement with stupid wog physics
and shrunk down tiny to fit in a tiny space.
I knew that the skeptics would say
DOX OR STFU so I included
photographic proof
of what a real
OT can do!
Thanks
Ron!

(Case closed you jerkoff critics! Much Love!)​

 

[byte301]

!!! OT SUCCESS STORY !!!

Today I was late for course and there were no remaining parking spaces.
I remembered what Ron said about not going into agreement with
MEST stops. And since I am on the PDC Course I decided to try
out my postulates and closed my eyes and that's when I
heard a giant CRASHING-CRUNCHING noise as my car
went out of agreement with stupid wog physics
and shrunk down tiny to fit in a tiny space.
I knew that the skeptics would say
DOX OR STFU so I included
photographic proof
of what a real
OT can do!
Thanks
Ron!

(Case closed you jerkoff critics! Much Love!)​

 

[_brian]

Dear Mr. Magical Operating Armadillo.

I do indeed graciously accept your apology, as I now know that it is my fault for not being able to have and believe what's true for You being true for me and how fucked up in the head and low toned that makes me, in fact I feel very bad emotionally, I probably shouldn't read any more of your recitations then, right?

Anyhoozers... I eagerly wanted to ask you if your new avatar is what your astral body looks like when you are fully exterior with 360 degree spherical perception? I mean, you do look so happy and I think I actually do want to learn the ways of the Magical Armadillo.

But also, when you are in you mest armadillo body, in your green bucket, can you make it pass through other buckets? or even make it skinnier to squeeze through tiny tiny spaces? What if one only has a regular old brown bucket that's kind of rusty and the bottom is falling out, is there still hope one can attain the wondrous state you are proselytizing? OH! and when we follow your path do we need to shave our bone heads and wear robes and flipflops, what is the best meal for a pre-magical armadillo? I heard something like rice and beans with no special sauce.

Well, I'm afraid... um... that I have hundreds of questions, but I honestly believe I'm not worthy of a direct personal response, but if you could help flesh out and make more real and true this true reality of yours for this old lugubrious and lost soul, it would be greatly treasured.

I will now sincerely STFU, Your's really very truly
FUITH

 

[AnonyMary]

!!! OT SUCCESS STORY !!!

Today I was late for course and there were no remaining parking spaces.
I remembered what Ron said about not going into agreement with
MEST stops. And since I am on the PDC Course I decided to try
out my postulates and closed my eyes and that's when I
heard a giant CRASHING-CRUNCHING noise as my car
went out of agreement with stupid wog physics
and shrunk down tiny to fit in a tiny space.
I knew that the skeptics would say
DOX OR STFU so I included
photographic proof
of what a real
OT can do!
Thanks
Ron!

(Case closed you jerkoff critics! Much Love!)​

Too funny, lol!!!

 

[SchwimmelPuckel]

You are the worst of all the failed-purpose losers on this natterboard.

Your attacks on me have been ferociously un-called for and completely out-of-line. But, as a Magic Armadillo, my ARC is so high for the little people who are so fucked up in the head like you, I take all this in stride.

Because - even though this may be a bit above your reality - I've been in comm with Ron.

Well, You're completely and utterly flat! Not by your own admission, but by being steamrollered.. - Which is a peculiar place to view the world from.. A strange viewpoint! - And from such flatness you pretend to offer magic as a solution to everything.. Well, magic -is- indeed a solution to everything! - That's no news.. We all knew that already!

Magic will make everything flat! - Everything! - Unless you prefer everything in all sharp corners? - Magic can do that too for yea!

Magic can crack the whole universe up for yea. But it's not all it's cracked up to be! - See magic, by definition, yanks anchor points! - It'll yank yer' gold balls.. Or was it Ron's gold balls? - Anyway magic will yank 'em! - The whole universe neutered! - Forever populated by eunuchs with squeeky voices!

And completely flat! - A 'no games' condition..

Didn't Ron tell you? - Well, I told you now..

If there's a lethal poison that will kill all reality, it's magic!

Anybody can win the lottery by magic, for example.. Which will bankrupt lotteries fast.. But by magic we cause 'em to not go bankrupt.. We want to win the lottery right! - So we have everybody winning billions of magical dollars in magical lotteries.. Well, all this money flooding the market will make the money worthless of course.. But we solve that problem with some more magic..

And really.. The reason we wanted to win the lottery in the first place was so that we could buy a Lamborghini for driving to work... But we can get to work by magic!

Don't feel bad.. We can feel good by magic too!

It's all hunky dory in the magical OT land!

(There are mothers who tell their kids that magic is bad!)