The Little Thread Which Grew - the Apollo '73 to Everything But

[RogerB]

http://www.forum.exscn.net/showthread.php?t=20923

Eh?

That doesn't answer the question methinks.

What were you "mea culpaing" for that your referred to when you apologized to Emma? You seemed to refer to an action of yours that contributed to or caused part of the flap.

In any event, if your action was a part of the why for the flap on the link you gave, your mea cupla should be over there where that traffic and attention is . . . no?

I haven't seen it there.

R

 

[SweetnessandLight]

I am not aware of what happened here with Carmelo. It would be nice to know more about what happened. Is the there a link available to read more about it?
Lakey

Lakey, quite possibly the less said about this, the better, here on our thread...let this be a safe haven for all. Having said that, I understand people's wanting to understand what is going on. Not to know causes anxiety and needless misunderstandings.

It seems that what was a long simmering personal dispute with several Free Zone types turned into some kind of a free for all fight on Terrill's board, which also has some members of and cross posters to ESMB, and has affected our board here as well.

It will all settle down eventually, (tempest in a teapot type of thing) but feelings are hurt and people are angry and upset, and feeling bad about having become involved in what was a personal issue and making the situation worse for everyone involved. Best not for us to GET involved in this one! Except to just try to be kind and love everybody involved... as the situation changes, viewpoints shift, and things settle down and right themselves, the way most disputes in groups do. We're all human and everybody makes mistakes...the goal in life is to learn and grow from your mistakes, and to survive them! Brownie points are added for learning from other people's mistakes and avoiding making them ourselves! That takes talent! Holding a calm space is likely the best thing we can do to help in the circumstance.

These kinds of things always make me think about the way OSA operatives stir the pot wherever people are having some trouble to try and break friends apart, divide and conquer, magnify the error of it all, etc....but this one might have just been a spontaneous blow-up that got out of hand. I am not taking sides, as I have friends and people I admire and wish well on both camps. The less said about the specifics of the argument, the better, so far as I see. Let the people involved work it out. Trust that all will be well.

For more of the story, just surf the today's posts catagory, Lakey, there are several threads that have been started to discuss it. Start with Emma's "I have a new opinion about the Freezone", there are several spin-off threads in rebuttal.

I am so proud of the way you are recreating a new chapter of life for yourself right now! Especially that you are making such good new friends. Really good friends are priceless, and having a big healthy happy social circle that one is an active and needed part of keeps us Healthy and Happy, all our lives.

I hate that so many Exes become loners and hermits as a safe space while they are licking their wounds and getting over Scientology, and then never grow out of it! It's dysfunctional behavior to me. That's why I love ESMB! We have virtual social circles that fulfill the same functions as in real life ones! We also have real life social circles that included many of our friends here...with open, permeable boundaries that welcome new and old friends in, as we choose.

I have observed that being in the COS as public tends to keep your nose to the grindstone of "doing" Scientology, and making or borrowing enough money to do so, to the exclusion of many other satisfying avenues of creative fun, socialization, personal growth and community service. After many years, one's social circle tends to shut down to a small group of people...or only a couple people.

Keep expanding outward as a being! (just not your tummy part)...

Lakey, your white hair is beautiful, striking and distinguished just as it is...go ahead and try something else for fun, but you don't need no stinkin' salt and pepper!!! All you need is a good haircut and you look like a movie star!!!

 

[SweetnessandLight]

This too will pass...

Carmellow, it's o.k. to kick yourself a few times and then get on with life. We all do this from time to time. If you have actively hurt or harmed someone, then Roger's advice is correct, go give a direct apology. (I give you much credit for giving a public apology, that is leading by example of your own good behavior.) If not, just go to the beach and look at the waves for awhile...it will all straighten itself out in due time.

The trouble with being in the moment is...sometimes the moment is very annoying!!! I try and be patient with people when I am out shopping, but have encountered the very same scenarios lately...rather than clearing my throat or glaring at them, or calling them out on their rudeness, I just stop stalk still in my tracks (where they can see me) and beam intensity like a lazer at them: love, joy, close observation, a big grin...humans are hard-wired to "feel" it when someone is looking at them intensely, as a survival skill. This does usually work like magic for me, the most sensitive of the two or group will snap a head up and look right at me, and this breaks the energy of the group and they move over, make room, or get on with their work, ask if they may help me, etc... Usually with sheepish but friendly smiles and no hard feelings. (I learned to move people around like this doing Aikido. It also works for controlling the attention of a group one is leading in some way as when one is a speaker or teacher. ALL good speakers and teachers have mastered this art.)

Your Thanksgiving sounds great...but a lot of work. Not surprised your dear wife had a physical issue to deal with just after. She may also be responding to whatever inner turmoil and stress you have been undergoing as well. Us wimmins tend to to that with our near and dear ones. We are uber empathizers! Hope it turns out to be nothing, and a little rest and happiness will restore her to wellbeing..

Flowing all good wishes your way...I am very grateful for your friendship and know that you are a valuable resource for other people in your community!

with Love from Sweetness!

 

[CarmeloOrchards]

Eh?

That doesn't answer the question methinks.

What were you "mea culpaing" for that your referred to when you apologized to Emma? You seemed to refer to an action of yours that contributed to or caused part of the flap.

In any event, if your action was a part of the why for the flap on the link you gave, your mea cupla should be over there where that traffic and attention is . . . no?

I haven't seen it there.

R

Roger,

Basically what I did was aid a friend (dianaclass8) who was getting beat up on BB's yahoo group. She was not pristine clean either. I used what I consider to be "Godfather" tech (from the book by Mario Puzo) and I illustrated having used it in the past. I took quotes from ESMB and overwhelmed a poster with her own creations. She departed. I suggested that the parties to the cat fight bring their differences here to the Apollo thread and talk about them with respect for each other, not flames. Emma didn't appreciate the "bring them here," and I gather she didn't take well to my using quotes from ESMB to smash this woman on BB's list.

I'm putting this delicately. I don't want to inflame something I was, actually, trying to extinguish.

I then proceeded to say (because the list is a scientology standard tech freezone list) that LRH was not a nice guy, that he would have approved what dianaclass8 did to the woman in question. I supported my assertion with scientology PLs and GO orders. I didn't go the next step (because of the scientology adherence), to trash LRH for covert ops a plenty. I did tacitly threaten that I would to BB if he didn't lay off of dianaclass8.

In summing this up, I used Scientology words to justify slamming a few people around. i detailed the points of policy. I can see how an impartial observer would have been taken aback. That was my contribution to disharmony. Dexter has left ESMB as a result of Emma's rant. I'm not happy about that.

 

[lkwdblds]

Well, la de da Sweet, what a great post!!

Lakey, quite possibly the less said about this, the better, here on our thread...let this be a safe haven for all. Having said that, I understand people's wanting to understand what is going on. Not to know causes anxiety and needless misunderstandings.

Very sage advice, Sweetness, but dang it all, the Lakey in me wants to take sides and back my friends and "correct" the opposition.

It seems that what was a long simmering personal dispute with several Free Zone types turned into some kind of a free for all fight on Terrill's board, which also has some members of and cross posters to ESMB, and has affected our board here as well.

It will all settle down eventually, (tempest in a teapot type of thing) but feelings are hurt and people are angry and upset, and feeling bad about having become involved in what was a personal issue and making the situation worse for everyone involved. Best not for us not to GET involved in this one! Except to just try to be kind and love everybody involved... as the situation changes, viewpoints shift, and things settle down and right themselves, the way most disputes in groups do. We're all human and everybody makes mistakes...the goal in life is to learn and grow from your mistakes, and to survive them! Brownie points are added for learning from other people's mistakes and avoiding making them ourselves! That takes talent! Holding a calm space is likely the best thing we can do to help in the circumstance.

These kinds of things always make me think about the way OSA operatives stir the pot wherever people are having some trouble to try and break friends apart, divide and conquer, magnify the error of it all, etc....but this one might have just been a spontaneous blow-up that got out of hand. I am not taking sides, as I have friends and people I admire and wish well on both camps. The less said about the specifics of the argument, the better, so far as I see. Let the people involved work it out. Trust that all will be well.

I tend to think more in black and white terms. I have friends whom I respect and I tend to back them up. This sounds good but there is also practical wisdom in your temperance and neutrality. It really depends on the issues themselves.

For more of the story, just surf the today's posts catagory, Lakey, there are several threads that have been started to discuss it. Start with Emma's "I have a new opinion about the Freezone", there are several spin-off threads in rebuttal.

I am so proud of the way you are recreating a new chapter of life for yourself right now! Especially that you are making such good new friends. Really good friends are priceless, and having a big healthy happy social circle that one is an active and needed part of keeps us Healthy and Happy, all our lives.

Thanks for the ack!! The fullness of life which these dear friends are affording me is virtually priceless. For 69 years, I was sort of out of step with every group I was in except that of a lover of classical music, but even loving classical music puts you out of step with many. I used to look at the popular people and wish I was one of them. I was for 5 years, from 2nd grade through 6th grade but puberty made me into a self conscious and shy hermit.

I hate that so many Exes become loners and hermits as a safe space while they are licking their wounds and getting over Scientology, and then never grow out of it! It's dysfunctional behavior to me. That's why I love ESMB! We have virtual social circles that fulfill the same functions as in real life ones! We also have real life social circles that included many of our friends here...with open, permeable boundaries that welcome new and old friends in, as we choose.

I have observed that being in the COS as public tends to keep your nose to the grindstone of "doing" Scientology, and making or borrowing enough money to do so, to the exclusion of many other satisfying avenues of creative fun, socialization, personal growth and community service. After many years, one's social circle tends to shut down to a small group of people...or only a couple people.

Keep expanding outward as a being! (just not your tummy part)...

Lakey, your white hair is beautiful, striking and distinguished just as it is...go ahead and try something else for fun, but you don't need no stinkin' salt and pepper!!! All you need is a good haircut and you look like a movie star!!!

S and L ly, I know the white hair looks distinguished but it makes me look old. I just want to look as young as possible.

Being in C of S "doing" Scientology by the rigid rules set down by Hubbard really removes any chance of freedom which a being may have. You have to subordinate your own goals to LRH's goals and your own wisdom and knowingness to his. In the process, you give up your freedom of speech and your ceativity. Your spirit of play has to go down the drain as well, though that usually takes a while to happen. If someone does not view life the way LRH does then that person becomes LRH's enemy and by transference becomes your enemy as well. You are cowed, bullied and threatened to do things LRH's way and then, doing so for many years, you are supposed to arrive as a Freed Being with supernatural powers, able to help others achieve similar powers. NOTHING COULD BE FURTHER FROM THE TRUTH THAN THIS SCENARIO!! Doing what you have to do requires giving up all your own freedoms and becomming a clone to another spiritual being or perhaps to two other beings, LRH and DM. Following the path demanded by those two beings can only lead one down the path opposite to that of a freed being.

I look at Heber who I considered a very fine man when I first met him in 1970. He had all the qualities I aspired to. Look at what 40 years in Scientology have done to that once beautiful being. This once proud and talented man is now living in a lowered condition, as a slave, under his desk in some god forsaken prison, somewhere in the desert. He has no freedoms at all left to him. He can't read a newspaper, make a phone call or talk to his family. He is 75 years old and is impisoned. It reminds me of the book and the movie, "The Dreyfuss Affair

Oh well, time to get off the soap box. Thanks again Sweetness for your kind and thoughtful post.
Lakey
PS - I just read Carmelo's post. I'll probably go back and reread what went on. It is a shame to have someone such as Dexter leave ESMB. Maybe he will eventually cool off and at least rejoin our thread.

 

[olska]

I hate that so many Exes become loners and hermits as a safe space while they are licking their wounds and getting over Scientology, and then never grow out of it! It's dysfunctional behavior to me. That's why I love ESMB! We have virtual social circles that fulfill the same functions as in real life ones! We also have real life social circles that included many of our friends here...with open, permeable boundaries that welcome new and old friends in, as we choose.

Some people were "loners" even before they became scientologists.

I know you read (books) because you've said so elsewhere; so before you paint all "loners" with the "dysfunctional" brush, here's a book you might find interesting:

Party of One: The Loners' Manifesto, by Anneli Rufus, Marlowe & Company, c. 2003.

 

[SweetnessandLight]

To clarify my intention...

Thank you Olska, I have dipped into that book in the past, but on your recommendation, I will fully read it.

There is nothing wrong with being alone, especially when one is becoming more and more a whole, happy and complete person in and of oneself. Being by oneself can be a joyful experience! I certainly don't mean to paint all "loners" with a dysfunctional brush...

However, some are "loners" because they do not yet have the skills to interact and get along well with others, or in groups large or small. I see this as a need for improvement in personal growth and development, that is surely attainable with help and "practice". I think some people who joined Scientology may have done so because they wished to handle this issue in their lives. Relationships (both good and bad) are key for many of us.

I do have great concern for those Exes who never ever talk about their COS experiences to anyone, or admit to being Exes, even after they are out. It's a big shame-based secret they keep from everyone...like having been in prison or a mental hospital.

(Some of them are acting like they are still in COS, and are only Exes in the privacy of their own minds and hearts! Shhh! Don't give them away! )

Some people are so introverted that they don't even trust and talk over their issues and the concerns of their hearts with their own spouses, or family members, for fear of having a knowledge report written up about them and their "outpoints" or "entheta", being sec checked, being punished by being RPFed, or being excluded from their group by banishment and "disconnected" from their loved ones and friends. They have been conditioned to do this as a pro-survival skill to survive being in the COS.

Some people exist in this state for many years. I say exist, because to me, that's not really living any kind of a quality life.

This IS dysfunctional.

And for some, even after they leave...the same pattern of introversion and mistrust, retreat from healthy interaction with others and involvement with life persists. Some here are struggling with overcoming this and breaking the pattern. (More power to them!)

That's who I am talking about.

I agree with you Olska that some people quite naturally are more highly social beings, are joiners, movers and shakers, etc, while others by nature are more quiet and apart, shy or reserved. Different strokes for different folks! That's all good.... That wasn't what I was relating to.

I have many friends who are both ways, and I respect them and try to accommodate their differing needs for space and closeness.

I apologize if I pushed anyone's buttons.

 

[olska]

<>
There is nothing wrong with being alone, especially when one is becoming more and more a whole, happy and complete person in and of oneself. Being by oneself can be a joyful experience! I certainly don't mean to paint all "loners" with a dysfunctional brush...

LOL. And then you go on to do exactly that, by writing:

However, some are "loners" because they do not yet have the skills to interact and get along well with others, or in groups large or small. I see this as a need for improvement in personal growth and development, that is surely attainable with help and "practice".

The dysfunction you are describing pertains not to "loners" at all, but rather to inherently "social" people who are not functioning according to THEIR (your) "normal."

Like most "social" people, you seem to have at least several common misconceptions about "loners;" but don't worry, you're not alone.

 

[lkwdblds]

More Pictures from the Thanksgiving Part

Here are some more pictures from the Thanksgiving day Party

That couch is where we hang out to sing the Karioke songs but judging from Lorinda and my expressions, Dave had pulled the plug out between the Karioke and the wall mounted flat screen TV and there was no picture or sound. I must say that Lorinda is extremely fetching in that picture. Sweetness, note the dark tones in the front of my hair. So far those that do not like the phoney hair coloring are my ex wife, Evy, and probably Sweetness. Those that do like it are Edey, Lorinda, Ginger and Evy's boyfriend Roberto. Hats, your opinion on the colored hair would be of interest to me. What do you say?

This is Katy, Lorinda and an attractive younger Oriental woman, Fiona

This was the main dinning table with Lorinda and me. The lady in a white sweater across from us is from Germany while her 25 year old daughter, Margo, with the blond braided hair is on the same side of the table with Lorinda and me.

I sang one of my German songs, Shubert's Trout, to Margo and her Mom and they loved it.
Lakey

 

[RogerB]

Roger,

Basically what I did was aid a friend (dianaclass8) who was getting beat up on BB's yahoo group. She was not pristine clean either. I used what I consider to be "Godfather" tech (from the book by Mario Puzo) and I illustrated having used it in the past. I took quotes from ESMB and overwhelmed a poster with her own creations. She departed. I suggested that the parties to the cat fight bring their differences here to the Apollo thread and talk about them with respect for each other, not flames. Emma didn't appreciate the "bring them here," and I gather she didn't take well to my using quotes from ESMB to smash this woman on BB's list.

I'm putting this delicately. I don't want to inflame something I was, actually, trying to extinguish.

I then proceeded to say (because the list is a scientology standard tech freezone list) that LRH was not a nice guy, that he would have approved what dianaclass8 did to the woman in question. I supported my assertion with scientology PLs and GO orders. I didn't go the next step (because of the scientology adherence), to trash LRH for covert ops a plenty. I did tacitly threaten that I would to BB if he didn't lay off of dianaclass8.

In summing this up, I used Scientology words to justify slamming a few people around. i detailed the points of policy. I can see how an impartial observer would have been taken aback. That was my contribution to disharmony. Dexter has left ESMB as a result of Emma's rant. I'm not happy about that.

OK, now those who care can think with this data. Before it was in the realm of "what the hell is you, him, her all talking about?"

I still think it would have been wiser to put the mea culpa over on the thread where it applies though . . . but hey, you probably had a judgment call on this and did it here for reason.

Now I have enough pieces to put together to understand the scene. Thanks.

R

 

[nexus100]

Roger,

Basically what I did was aid a friend (dianaclass8) who was getting beat up on BB's yahoo group. She was not pristine clean either. I used what I consider to be "Godfather" tech (from the book by Mario Puzo) and I illustrated having used it in the past. I took quotes from ESMB and overwhelmed a poster with her own creations. She departed. I suggested that the parties to the cat fight bring their differences here to the Apollo thread and talk about them with respect for each other, not flames. Emma didn't appreciate the "bring them here," and I gather she didn't take well to my using quotes from ESMB to smash this woman on BB's list.

I'm putting this delicately. I don't want to inflame something I was, actually, trying to extinguish.

I then proceeded to say (because the list is a scientology standard tech freezone list) that LRH was not a nice guy, that he would have approved what dianaclass8 did to the woman in question. I supported my assertion with scientology PLs and GO orders. I didn't go the next step (because of the scientology adherence), to trash LRH for covert ops a plenty. I did tacitly threaten that I would to BB if he didn't lay off of dianaclass8.

In summing this up, I used Scientology words to justify slamming a few people around. i detailed the points of policy. I can see how an impartial observer would have been taken aback. That was my contribution to disharmony. Dexter has left ESMB as a result of Emma's rant. I'm not happy about that.

Thank you for this classic-and I do mean classic-example of power tripping.

 

[CarmeloOrchards]

Thank you for this classic-and I do mean classic-example of power tripping.

now that I've thought about it, I can top it (having looked a little)

Emma is being attacked by a Scientology Op.

Diana did a non clandestine, but nevertheless Op on a non functioning member of ESMB called Oreacle.

I was in the back ground, not trying to make peace.

Oreacle exploded on BB's Yahhoo ghroups. BB and others added to the mayhem.

I did what I've already explained.

How small and stupid I feel justifying a Scientology style Op to someone who is getting one run on her. Can you spell moron? That's how I feel.

 

[nexus100]

now that I've thought about it, I can top it (having looked a little)

Emma is being attacked by a Scientology Op.

Diana did a non clandestine, but nevertheless Op on a non functioning member of ESMB called Oreacle.

I was in the back ground, not trying to make peace.

Oreacle exploded on BB's Yahhoo ghroups. BB and others added to the mayhem.

I did what I've already explained.

How small and stupid I feel justifying a Scientology style Op to someone who is getting one run on her. Can you spell moron? That's how I feel.

I assume you feel that way because you were operating unconcsiously. Which is now converted to consciousness and therefore was a good and useful thing to do, as was the entire episode.
Easier to say at a quiet distance, of course. But I'm having a ball with this.

 

[CarmeloOrchards]

I assume you feel that way because you were operating unconcsiously. Which is now converted to consciousness and therefore was a good and useful thing to do, as was the entire episode.
Easier to say at a quiet distance, of course. But I'm having a ball with this.

life is too short not to.

 

[lkwdblds]

Olska and Sweetness - timely dialogue

LOL. And then you go on to do exactly that, by writing:



The dysfunction you are describing pertains not to "loners" at all, but rather to inherently "social" people who are not functioning according to THEIR (your) "normal."

Like most "social" people, you seem to have at least several common misconceptions about "loners;" but don't worry, you're not alone.

It is good to see Olska post here. IMHO she is a very astute person and her posts usually are quite incisive. Sweetness is a veteran of the ESMB game and can and does certainly acquit herself well. The topic they are discussing is lively and timely.

I am not going to choose sides. Have at it ladies. Each of you makes some very pertinent points!

I tend to go along with the old adage, "The pen is mighier than the sword." I like to vent my thoughts in writing and probably take that form of communication a bit too far at times. I am trying to tone it done just a little. Anyway,I find that having a forum to vent things on in writing is very empowering and very cathartic. It also tends to pull in opposing viewpoints and that leads to a person becomming better educated in life skills.
Lakey

 

[CarmeloOrchards]

I tend to go along with the old adage, "The pen is mighier than the sword."

One of my favorite cartoon panels of all time was in Playboy in the mid 60s. It was a knight writing in sand with his bloody sword (from the dead body near by) "The sword is mightier than..."

 

[SweetnessandLight]

Here are some more pictures from the Thanksgiving day Party

That couch is where we hang out to sing the Karioke songs but judging from Lorinda and my expressions, Dave had pulled the plug out between the Karioke and the wall mounted flat screen TV and there was no picture or sound. I must say that Lorinda is extremely fetching in that picture. Sweetness, note the dark tones in the front of my hair. So far those that do not like the phoney hair coloring are my ex wife, Evy, and probably Sweetness. Those that do like it are Edey, Lorinda, Ginger and Evy's boyfriend Roberto. Hats, your opinion on the colored hair would be of interest to me. What do you say?

This is Katy, Lorinda and an attractive younger Oriental woman, Fiona

This was the main dinning table with Lorinda and me. The lady in a white sweater across from us is from Germany while her 25 year old daughter, Margo, with the blond braided hair is on the same side of the table with Lorinda and me.

I sang one of my German songs, Shubert's Trout, to Margo and her Mom and they loved it.
Lakey

I'm really glad you had a Happy Thanksgiving, Lakey! Good for you!

 

[SweetnessandLight]

Don't know why I am being deliberately misread...

It is good to see Olska post here. IMHO she is a very astute person and her posts usually are quite incisive. Sweetness is a veteran of the ESMB game and can and does certainly acquit herself well. The topic they are discussing is lively and timely.

I am not going to choose sides. Have at it ladies. Each of you makes some very pertinent points!

I tend to go along with the old adage, "The pen is mighier than the sword." I like to vent my thoughts in writing and probably take that form of communication a bit too far at times. I am trying to tone it done just a little. Anyway,I find that having a forum to vent things on in writing is very empowering and very cathartic. It also tends to pull in opposing viewpoints and that leads to a person becomming better educated in life skills.
Lakey

I agree Lakey!

Olska, Lakey has called you astute, I accept his estimation of you.

In this post by you, where I bolded my writing for clarity...:
"Originally Posted by SweetnessandLight

There is nothing wrong with being alone, especially when one is becoming more and more a whole, happy and complete person in and of oneself. Being by oneself can be a joyful experience! I certainly don't mean to paint all "loners" with a dysfunctional brush...
LOL. And then you go on to do exactly that, by writing:

Quote:
However, some are "loners" because they do not yet have the skills to interact and get along well with others, or in groups large or small. I see this as a need for improvement in personal growth and development, that is surely attainable with help and "practice".
The dysfunction you are describing pertains not to "loners" at all, but rather to inherently "social" people who are not functioning according to THEIR (your) "normal."

Like most "social" people, you seem to have at least several common misconceptions about "loners;" but don't worry, you're not alone."

...you seem to have missed or overlooked my use of the word "some", and are deliberately trying to disregard, misconstrue or twist my words here:

"There is nothing wrong with being alone, especially when one is becoming more and more a whole, happy and complete person in and of oneself. Being by oneself can be a joyful experience! I certainly don't mean to paint all "loners" with a dysfunctional brush..." to mean something other than what I was saying.

This tells me that you are quite defensive on this issue. I don't know why, and I don't care to know why.

There is no "normal". There are states and stages of being more or less able and self-actualized, and being more or less functional in one's communications and interactions with one's fellow humans.

All humans are inherently social beings. We would not survive without social skills and interdependence. Being social is a gradient, from anti-social to pro-social. Only those with some organic neurological damage such as Aspergers syndrome (which many have) or Autism, or functional problems such as OCD or other severe anxiety disorders leading to agoraphobia causing them to to really opt out of social interactions, by force of their brain chemistry, can be considered to be real true loners to my way of thinking.

If you disagree with that, it's o.k. with me. Your life experience and self-image are your own. Once again, I have nothing against those who prefer their own company most of the time as a matter of routine, who don't enjoy attending parties, or other social gatherings, or working in a community of people, who chose not to engage or make many friendly connections with very many people. If you do, that's fine for you. Blessings! Enjoy your life on your own terms, that's great!

However, you do seem to be jumping to conclusions and making judgments about me.

You seem to have a button on the word "dysfunctional". I'm sorry I pushed it. I had no intent to offend you. I don't know you and wasn't talking about you or anyone related to you.

I encourage and support Lakey in his blossoming social life, as he describes here...:
Lakey said: "Thanks for the ack!! The fullness of life which these dear friends are affording me is virtually priceless. For 69 years, I was sort of out of step with every group I was in except that of a lover of classical music, but even loving classical music puts you out of step with many. I used to look at the popular people and wish I was one of them. I was for 5 years, from 2nd grade through 6th grade but puberty made me into a self conscious and shy hermit."

...in response to my saying: "I hate that so many Exes become loners and hermits as a safe space while they are licking their wounds and getting over Scientology, and then never grow out of it! It's dysfunctional behavior to me. That's why I love ESMB! We have virtual social circles that fulfill the same functions as in real life ones! We also have real life social circles that included many of our friends here...with open, permeable boundaries that welcome new and old friends in, as we choose." (Maybe I should clarify here that it's the never growing out of it, not just being in that space for a while to lick one's wounds, that I feel is the dysfunctional part about this.)

It's been very fun to watch him come out of his cocoon!

None of this was about you Olska or was in any way meant as a put down to you or anyone who identifies themselves as a "loner".

 

[Mark A. Baker]

I put a rinse on two days ago and my hair went as dark as Lorinda's. She looks better in it though. My hairdresser forgot to put the neutralilzer in after my perm and now any added color grabs. Girl talk.

Care to post a pic? It would be useful whenever I need to boil water.


Mark A. Baker

 

[Mark A. Baker]

Lakey, quite possibly the less said about this, the better, here on our thread...let this be a safe haven for all. Having said that, I understand people's wanting to understand what is going on. Not to know causes anxiety and needless misunderstandings.

It seems that what was a long simmering personal dispute with several Free Zone types turned into some kind of a free for all fight on Terrill's board, which also has some members of and cross posters to ESMB, and has affected our board here as well.

Moreover Ed wasn't culpable for the upsets, he's just big about assuming responsibility.


Mark A. Baker