Part forgotten, but never forgotten for me
Approx 2000? Really dont remember....
This is part of something that happened while in the RPF, second time. Note that there are a ton of stories related to others that I have, which I have not mentioned. This one is just an addition to my story.
One fine day I was working on decks. I overheard someone say something about John Mustard having back pains. John Mustard is a very, very close friend of mine. We used to hang out all the time. He was like my father, I guess, though he had his own, other kids, he did not mind taking me on too. He was working at the Manor Hotel at the time.
I knew that something was horribly wrong. I ran up to see the RPF I/C and begged him to find out for me. He said he didn't think it was a big deal, with a back pain, whats the deal. I was VERY upset and he knew it would be best to just check and make sure. So he did. And I was called to his office very shortly after. John had kidney cancer. I was so upset about it.
Despite being trapped in the RPF, they actually approved for me to go see him. I was in good graces at that time on the RPF (And Alex Meyer ain't really a bad guy. He has a heart).
So I went to see John. He was so emaciated (John, for those who don't know him, is quite tall and had a little or not so little pot belly). He could barely talk or move. This was advanced cancer. He had pills he was supposed to take and he wasn't taking them, he didn't even have them. I wrote up a report because he wasn't being cared for. I was really upset about it.
If I could, I would have given one of my kidneys to him. I was so late seeing him. I think after he saw me, he died within days. I was so angry and frustrated.
(And earlier than that, Carol Monroe had died of brain cancer, and Allen Hubbert died of cancer too. I think his was brain cancer). Both Allen and John were like father figures for me. Allen was more my auditor though, but John I had known for 15 years or so and this one really pissed me off (I couldnt cry, and still havent been able to).
Please, if past lives are real, can't he come back to me? He is someone I miss more than anything.
So they let me go to his funeral and oh yeah - I cried and cried and cried then. I remember I couldnt stop! (Thats right! I forgot about that).

His wife/widow spoke at his funeral - she was hardly ever around because she was uplines and he was not so they were not together much.
I was supposed to talk to her I guess, I dont know. I couldn't talk to anyone. I felt like I was the only one crying for him! Everyone else had their damn TR's IN!!! What the f*ck is up with these people?!?!? (Ok, breathe, breathe, calm down girl).:grouch2:
Anyways, I went to see RPF I/C again and asked if I could send her (the widow) a letter and would he let it go through (we were not allowed to originate communications, but were allowed to respond to communications to us, and she had never talked to me). Anyways, he was nice enough to let me do that. I wrote her a really long heart-felt letter and she responded and we ended up becoming pretty good friends for a while there. After I finished the RPF, she was on (she got sent there sometime after his death) and I kept in constant touch with her, checking on how she was doing and her progress and so forth.
Ok, that brought back some tough memories....
There was a build up of so many things, which are coming out slowly but surely here, that led to me getting out, in any way that I could. And it was intentional, getting out how I did. And that made people mad. What can I say?
SO MANY people dying of cancer in my life. Is that because I am SP and I did that? If you ask the church, that is what they might say.
Ok, I need a break here.
