The clouds are finally clearing in my life! It's been 25yr since I left. During the last 25yrs I was hospitalized 4 times because of PTSD. Prozac works wonders!!! My mom disowned me because I was finding truth outside of scientology. I lost another sister who disowned me. I spent the first 5yrs out of the church writing a journal to get the pain out my head. It didn't seem it would ever leave but little by little month by month year by year life began replacing the pain. I was 15 when my mom got my family in and we joined the church. The pain started the first day arriving on the Excalibur. The pain mounted daily and continued for the next 8yrs. I learned how to not feel pain and only inhabited my head as a routine basis. I'm still learning how to stay in my body.
been there done that not going back
- Thread starter Bug
- Start date
dontscamme
Patron Meritorious
Bug!Glad you joined the board. You will find much support here.
dchoiceisalwaysrs
Gold Meritorious Patron
Welcome Bug
Thank you for being here, where did the Excalibur sail when you are on it?
Thank you for being here, where did the Excalibur sail when you are on it?
Kathy (ImOut)
Gold Meritorious Patron
Welcome, Bug!!!
EP - Ethics Particle
Gold Meritorious Patron
HCObringOrder?
Silver Meritorious Patron
Welcome Bug.
Since you mention the Excalibur, You may know some folks here and on the EX-Sea Org board.
I am sorry that you have family still in.
There are some on the board who may be able to help you with that.
Since you mention the Excalibur, You may know some folks here and on the EX-Sea Org board.
I am sorry that you have family still in.
There are some on the board who may be able to help you with that.
Thank you all for the welcome. When I was on the Excalibur it mostly stayed docked in the LA harbor. THere was an occa. trip around the break water. We did anchor out there for a few days one time. I heard there was transmission problems and the engineers were determined to show thier loyalty to Ron and fix it before the ships were gotten rid of in 1975. And they did. I did enjoy sailing. That was the only thing I enjoyed in the SO. I was 15 and came from Nebraska. I didn't know the stuff I watched on TV was real (the crime shows) until I got to LA with my Mom, twin sister, my oldest sister, her husband and six kids. It was a real culture shock! While on the DPF The women had to go into the men's head to fill cleaning buckets because it had the only utility sink. You had to pretend you didn't see the men sitting on the toilets when you went in there. You were told "It's just a body."
My neices and nephews were all taken to the cadet org right off. THe DPF training was only supposed to take 1 week. My mom and oldest sister and her husband finished and they left the ship to work at another org. My twin and I took longer because the studying was hard. I didn't even know what life was about and then had to learn about this big organization. I missed my mom and it was several months before I saw her again. Eventually they got tired of trying to train me I guess and sent my sister and I to the cadet org too.
The cadet org was literally what you imagine when you think of an orphanage. Three condemned victorian houses filled with roaches and lice. Everyone who arrived there had at least a week of diarrhea. The bedrooms were wall to wall mattresses. To top it off Narcanon was in another house right next door to one of the cadet org houses. The children went to sleep listening to people screaming in the house next door as they went through drug withdrawl less than 10 feet away from the window where the kids slept.
Upon arriving at the cadet org, my sister and I were given the responsibility of 8 preschool children each. We had to be school teachers and teach them how to read and write and be adults. We spent 16hrs a day caring for these kids and got $1 a week. I was overwhelmed and cried a lot. THere were so many kids and so few staff. They definitely didn't get their emotional needs met. I remember the kids all cussed like sailors. There was always a lot of yelling.
One day word got out that the health department was coming to inspect. It was a big flap! The child care was all being done illegally in crowded filthy conditions. In order to present a proper staff to child ratio, all the older kids apx. 8yrs and up, including me and my sister, were sent to the Excalibur to hide. We spent a week there and brought a healthy infestation of lice and roaches on board the ship. There was an all hands all night long cleaning and spraying mattress out on the deck, boiling the kids clothes in the galley and shampooing and combing lice out of hair.
WHat fond memories. That's the first 3 months of my "sentence" of 8yrs.
Wisened One
Crusader
Oh God, Bug.! 
The HELL you went through and as a young child, onwards!
Wow.
YOU keep sharing your story now, ya hear? YOU are gonna help MANY be sharing it!
And PLEASE go post it at Ex-Scientology Kids website!
You might find others there that you knew!
Their site:
http://www.exscientologykids.com/
Their Forums:
http://www.exscientologykids.com/eskforums/
But keep posting!
You are among friends, now.
Michelle
The HELL you went through and as a young child, onwards! Wow.
YOU keep sharing your story now, ya hear? YOU are gonna help MANY be sharing it!
And PLEASE go post it at Ex-Scientology Kids website!
You might find others there that you knew! Their site:
http://www.exscientologykids.com/
Their Forums:
http://www.exscientologykids.com/eskforums/
But keep posting!
You are among friends, now. Michelle
byte301
Crusader
Oh God, Bug.!
Wow.
YOU keep sharing your story now, ya hear? YOU are gonna help MANY be sharing it!
And PLEASE go post it at Ex-Scientology Kids website!
Their site:
http://www.exscientologykids.com/
Their Forums:
WO, bug left 25 years ago. Wouldn't this board be a better fit then the kid's board?
http://www.exscientologykids.com/eskforums/
But keep posting!
Michelle
WO, bug left 25 years ago. Wouldn't this board be a better fit then the kid's board?
dontscamme
Patron Meritorious
ESK was set up mainly for people who grew up in Scn to exchange stories and get support. Their current age doesn't matter. Sharone, who was in the CMO with LRH roughly 4 decades ago, posts there, which is good.
Practically speaking, though, since Kendra left, Jenna stopped posting, and Astra has been extremely busy with other things, the level of activity there has been very low.
I'm sure Bug would be very welcome at ESK, though there are far fewer people there to supply feedback and support.
Edit: Jenna just posted at ESK for the first time in a long time, so I want to give her credit for that. She is also very busy and has an infant to take care of.
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