STATEMENT ON DEBBIE COOK--PART II
17 February 2012
Much hoopla has been made over the so-called fact that Debbie Cook was a revered and respected Captain of the FSO in Clearwater, FL. Actually Ms. Cook was never the Captain of anything within the Sea Organization. "Captain" was merely a humorous title given to her by fellow staff members. For example: "There goes Captain Debbie, strutting around like she runs the place". The fact is we were all very patient with Debbie's delusions of grandeur. We all tried to help her and rehabilitate her. But the technology of Scientology only works if you are honest and give up your overt and withheld actions. Ms. Cook obviously never did that fully and as a result she blew and is blaming the leadership for the very crimes that she herself committed. Please look up the definition for Overt motivator sequence in our Tech Dictionary, available for sale at any of our local Orgs.
There is no such thing as "The Hole". The RPF is a relaxing retreat for staff members who need a rejuvenating break. We deny that Ms. Cook even came to California during the past decade. There is no record or memory of her being here. She is delusional. The "missing" executives she listed in her Black PR email are all on double top secret assignment to infiltrate the suppressive Government of Bulgravia in order to make that zone safe for Scientology. Thanks to her email their efforts are now blown and will now be reassigned to Australia. They will each undergo plastic surgery and receive new identities.
Despite all of this evil intention to destroy the Church we are growing by leaps and bounds. That is all anyone needs to consider. Rising stats indicate that we are the most ethical organization the planet, and within the planetary confederation of which "Earth" is a member. Since our first Statement two days ago we have received the updated stats, at 2:01 in the afternoon yesterday, Thursday. All stats in the first Statement are now 2Xed. We expect a further doubling in the coming week.
Kathy True is available for any questions regarding the Church and it's leadership. We only select the most ethical among us to be our Spokesperson. David Miscavige is busy right now compiling more heretofore undiscovered writings by our Founder. A New Release will be announced this Fall, which greatly angers Debbie Cook, hence her attempts to derail us. Our members eagerly await the New Release, and will gladly and voluntarily pay for it.
If only the Church were this stupid to actualy put out something like this. Well perhaps they are close.
I guess essentially the statements they actually do make have this level of stupidity but are just written in a style where one can be fooled.