My story

Dulloldfart

Squirrel Extraordinaire
I had a wonderful wedding today. It was PERFECT! I have a very loving family who has helped every step of the way to make it a great moment of our lives. My husband and I are so very excited about the future.

I am sorry to say, despite the invitation, my mother did not attend. She did, however, send good wishes and her blessing via my grandmother. I was happy to hear that.

It was a perfect day, despite the cold weather! :happydance:

Congratulations! :party:

Pix? :)

Paul
 

SchwimmelPuckel

Genuine Meatball
I had a wonderful wedding today. It was PERFECT! I have a very loving family who has helped every step of the way to make it a great moment of our lives. My husband and I are so very excited about the future.


I am sorry to say, despite the invitation, my mother did not attend. She did, however, send good wishes and her blessing via my grandmother. I was happy to hear that.

It was a perfect day, despite the cold weather! :happydance:
Congratulations! :party:
(Look! This board software is acting up. I posted this congratulation post on the 21! - Yet the date on this post erroneously shows the 26 like I had posted 5 days too late! - Which you all know I'd never do! - No way! - Unthinkable! - So of course we must conclude that the calandar bits of the program is borked, right!? - Stupid software!!! )

:yes:
 

Enthetan

Master of Disaster
I had a wonderful wedding today. It was PERFECT! I have a very loving family who has helped every step of the way to make it a great moment of our lives. My husband and I are so very excited about the future.


I am sorry to say, despite the invitation, my mother did not attend. She did, however, send good wishes and her blessing via my grandmother. I was happy to hear that.

It was a perfect day, despite the cold weather! :happydance:

I am very happy for you Bea!
 

Dave

Patron
Growing up Scientology

1975 - 1980 (ish)

This story is not for the faint hearted. Read on, if you wish. I will have to do in segments, as it covers thirty years.

When I was born, my mother was already on staff in a Cl V org. She really wanted to join the Sea Org, but, per her, my father would not have it. He was also in staff in the same org. (My mother told me stories about him which I don't know if they are true as I did not hear his side). I also have an older brother. Both of us used to hang out at the org with her.

I remember one time my brother got bored and disappeared. The police brought him back in to the org. He had gone outside onto a four lane street and was walking on the yellow line. He was four or five at that time. Another time he was found walking down the street by a friend about 1/2 mile from the org. The friend asked him where he was going, and he said he was walking to his grandparents house (500 miles away). He brought him back to the org.

A few years later, I dont know exactly, my dad got in trouble and got himself declared. He was then pretty much out of our lives. Now that he wasnt around to stop my mom, she decided to join the Sea Org. She packed us all up and took the car to California to join the Sea Org, which she did.

This put me and my brother in the CEO (Cadet Estates Org), which at that time, was next to CCI, on Franklin and Bronson.

As we got a bit older, and I guess more independant, we kinda went off on our own. I do know that I hardly ever saw my mom. She was constantly being sent on mission. She would show up every few months or so and visit for a few days, on family time, then leave again.

I remember many times when she would come for family time and just sleep. Or just stare off into space. I asked her "what are you thinking about?" and she would tell me "post" and I would ask if she always thinks about post on family time, does she think about her family on post time? (thinking that maybe she thought of us sometimes? Maybe for a little bit?). No answer. I felt so ignored.

Anyways, I love my mother, and I forgive her, if she ever reads this. Unfortunately, I am sure she is oblivious to what she did and has done to her kids. (And what the Sea Org has done to her).

At one point, my brother managed to contact our father and he came to visit us every week! That was so cool! And then my mom was getting all sick and stuff and we wanted to stay and live with our dad for the rest of our lives!! And she got even sicker and then one day in the middle of the night we left the area and went back to LA. Never to see my dad again. She even cancelled child support from him.

So back in LA, with no real control of us, we pretty much did whatever we wanted. I had no idea how to get money so I learned how to steal from my brother. And we did alot of that. I also learned that if I sat on this guys lap for a while, he would give me money too. And another guy too would touch me with his hands and he gave me money too. I was oh, 10 - 13 years old through all of this. Where was my mom? I don't remember. I didnt even learn how to brush my teeth - nobody around taught me a thing. And if I couldnt find anyone to "earn" money from (as above), I could steal from vending machines, or the mexican wogs who made our food.

I am not claiming innocence in this. I am just telling my story. (But the church really makes you feel guilty and responsible for it!).

I was doing alright in school, except I remember one time a girl telling me that I was always wearing the exact same dress every day. I probably was. I didnt even notice. Also my hair was always tangled and I could not get it fixed and I had lice so many times. (I am NOT a disguisting bum, but it sure sounds like it!).

Later, I got sent to speech class, which REALLY upset me and I decided not to go to school anymore. I ditched like, oh 98% of the time. I remember many times they (my brother, my step dad and my mom) tried to get me to school. It is kinda humorous: My dad tried twice, first time he ran out of gas and didnt have enough money to get me to school and back to post, second time the car broke down. My brother brought me to the bus and watched me get on. He told me he would be there to pick me up when the bus returned me, to be sure I went. So when he turned around, I told the driver I had to go to BR, and ran out of the bus, spent the whole day roaming the city (after having stolen a box of snickers and started feeding them to all the neighborhood dogs). Then when it was time to pick me up, I was around the corner and as the buses unloaded, I just blended in with the crowd.

Yep, I missed as much school as I could. Any excuse was good for me: It was raining, the sun was shining, anything to get out of school.

I remember one time my friend invited me to her house. I stayed over for 3 months before my mom found me. I had stopped going to school entirely. She was pretty mad at me.

Ok, I was not the perfect child, but I had no-one but my brother raising me, if he was.

More later.

Please tell me what era this was, was his the early era or the golden era...

joking aside What year was this.

Not that it mattered, sounds like it may have been while was in the SO.

I saw the same type of institutional abuse of Scientology staff kids.

I won't go into my own story here but ther are mirrors... Your story made me laugh.

btw... screw guilt..

After a life lived, lost whatever I have discovered thorugh my experience that Scienology and every other "mission" destroys familys. It destroyed mine and I learned that the most important thing in this world is in fact family.

Perhaps your Scientology parent would think differently if they thought that they would inherrit the results of your progeny in their future life.

In my talks with my son pre-birth I came to an understanding that I have been living through time in this one blood line for a long time. Our spiritual growth IS part of our DNA that we pass down to our children.

Our children thus provide the only perfect match for us to inhabit and continue this game. I could not, as I thought as a kid, end up as a starving kid in Africa next life, for example, because my GE is matched to this blood line.

Thus having children gives you a right, a position, to bodies of progony of your own blood line.

I think I was my Grandfather, and that my son is my brother who died over 20 years ago.

My son would go exterior during sleep time and I encouraged him to stay in touch with his advisors and ansetors during that time while I would watch his body.

I then came to realize that Richard, my brother, is one of his close and trusted ansestors and advisors. He would and I think still does, check with this source often

One day he woke up histerical.

He looked at me like he had lost his father. He was very traumatised.

I ran a locational and what came to me in the end was that when he came back to his body he came back as Richard, and when he looked at me I was his brother, so where was hs daddy?

His daddy being gone was a hugh upset for him, and we finally came to a peace that while I was his brother while he was Richard, I was his father as Liam. In reality thos lables didn't really mean much. I would be here in either or any identity.

A locational brought him back and thus me but it was very traumatic and eye opening.

It seems that what you do with your own children is the only way we can change the worlds future.

Now, at 54, I am the full time, 24/7 stay at home dad for my 2 year old son and only child. I am raising him to be free but not follow anyology.

I say if it has a lable it is far too limited.

My son, and thus my famly, is now my mission, my life and all I care about.

You could measure the amount of time I have spent away from him in hours... I will raise him, home school him, and continue that mission until my death.

I wonder now why he will hate me later? LOL

Love to chat more

Dave

My father on persisting through org lines.

"The supreme test of a theatan is the ability to wait until things go right".
 

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Lurker5

Gold Meritorious Patron
Peace unto you

Bea Kiddo, most incredible, amazing story ever. Just magnificent. I read the whole thing (Alanzo), in one setting (and did not get any work done - too bad). May blessings shower down upon you. What a heart you have, Kiddo, what a heart. And I LOVE the avatar :)
 

JBTrendy

Patron with Honors
Arthur's wife at that time name was Lori. She was French. They were married around 1982.

I didn't remember them having the 8th floor of Leb Hall at the time. From what I recall, they had a room in the Main Building. Arthur got the 8th floor room a few years later. From what I was told, it was LRH's wish that that suite get renovated for his children, and Arthur was the only one left in the SO at that time.

I remember that Arthur was quite paranoid about people coming to his room. He had a gun collection.

Lori was apparently a real problem to management. I think she was a fairly new Scientologist and new in the Sea Org. She talked way too much. She wound up first retreading the EPF and then, I think about a year later, she was routed out altogether. She and Arthur got divorced.

I have no idea whatever happened to her.
I remember Lori as I stayed at her house while attending the Saint Hill arts festival in 1994. She was on line at AOSH UK and was a sculptor. She was quite a hot chick that use to be modeling in her early days in France. I got to know her even better while on my OT levels in 2001. She had two lovely blond daughters from another husband then Arthur and a horse that I use to ride. I met her son called Eliah if I remember it well who was in his early 20s at that time and was very smart and uptone guy. I guess she still lives there. We got along great and she wasn't the kind of person who would get tamed by no mean. It indicates when you mention they had a hard time with her on SO line in LA. I've been there in 99 on a project with and for the Jive Aces at Bridge. And boy as a Frenchy I quite rescented theyr freeky robotic controlling manners. I guess I gave them a hard time too but that's another story I'll tell you later.

As to Lori, I think she got up onto OT7 but was taken off having lots of finances to handle. She launched a business of computer hatting program that went on very well for a time. Then I lost tracks as I went off lines shortly after. We didn't discuss much about Arthur though as it appeared to me as a pretty enturbulative story that could have interfere with my going up the bridge. So I restrained myself from asking too much about it when I'ld have like to know more fore sure.
All 2 U Trendy
 
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Alanzo

Bardo Tulpa
I remember Lori as I stayed at her house while attending the Saint Hill arts festival in 1994. She was on line at AOSH UK and was a sculptor. She was quite a hot chick that use to be modeling in her early days in France. I got to know her even better while on my OT levels in 2001. She had two lovely blond daughters from another husband then Arthur and a horse that I use to ride. I met her son called Eliah if I remember it well who was in his early 20s at that time and was very smart and uptone guy. I guess she still lives there. We got along great and she wasn't the kind of person who would get tamed by no mean. It indicates when you mention they had a hard time with her on SO line in LA. I think she got up onto OT7 but was taken off having lots of finances to handle. She launched a business of computer hatting program that went on very well for a time. Then I lost tracks as I went off lines shortly after. We didn't discuss much about Arthur though as it appeared to me as a pretty enturbulative story that could have interfere with my going up the bridge. So I restrained myself from asking too much about it when I'ld have like to know more about it.
All 2 U Trendy
Welcome to ESMB, Trendy!
 

JBTrendy

Patron with Honors
Peter wasn't the only person "invited" to join the SO at Int who had taken LSD.

There were three fine artists at the time who were working in the LRH Art Bureau. Barry Shereshevsky, Rick Rodgers and someone named Jeannie (I think her name was Jeannie Hall). When they moved the Art Bureau uplines with PDO these three, who, if I recall correctly, had all taken LSD, were "invited" by DM to go.

All three of them declined.

I'm sure they were "persona non grata" after that.
Whao! I didn't know about that one

We should re-baptize him Peter SCHLSD!

This shows once more as if it was needed how arbitrary goes as far as DM is concerned.

Here's another one : I got from the Jives who have been uplines to record theyr "Bolt from the blue" album that one of the top musicians that were there was the former drummer from "Simple Mind". Do you remember that fantastic Scottish band? "Rain keeps falling down, down". And guess what, the guy was posted as a techie at Gold and not playing much drum anymore. I guess he didn't get a real kick at Shless' music more than I did. This guy seemed to have an absolute monopoly on all the music that got composed for Gold at that time. And this tends to show how true artistic talents got wasted, neglected and somehow totally invalidated on these lines. But I've got so much to say on this that I will keep it for later contributions. Thanks for reading.

Trendy (with obviously quite some BPC on the subject)

Thanks, I feel better now.
 

JBTrendy

Patron with Honors
Thank you Alenzo

Welcome to ESMB, Trendy!
:coolwink:

Feels so good to get in comm with terminals I can share reality with again.

I've been off lines since 2002 and had no clue about the existing scene out in the Freezone. Funilly enough, I used to call myself a Free Org member even when operating on Church PR lines as a public or SO member that alltogether lasted for 15 intensive years.

Next step for me is read your story as I just completed Bea's and get on with Idenics that totally indicates according to what I got from Mike Golstein posts. Totally mind blowing. Then I will tell you about my sensational adventures...

That's gonna be quite a cycle to go through especially in English that isn't easy for me to write in being of this very special breed of cat known as Froggies.

I feel your support though and that's nice.

But before I leave this thread to get on with mine, I surely want to thank Bea for the great time I had reading about her and the very exciting life she have had and wish her so damn well in the future with her family.

And please let me ack the old man who got us all here in the first place as if it wasn't for LRH to some extent, do you think we would have had a chance to get such a kick on spending all this time sharing our experiences and the magic of being who we are for one another ?

This site is incredible and I just spent the last three days close to full time on it since I discovered it. I learned so much and got incredible wins out of connecting up with the amazing people that are contributing to this wonderfull creation.

Before I leave you to catch up with some sleep to get my ruds in to go on with more astonishing cycles of actions, let's all grasp the Theta that is all there is in the outcome when one feel the FNing everlasting end phenomena of being alive.

The Honorary LRH PPRO 4th Dynamic Auditor formerly known as Jean Tox

From now on just call me Trendy

JB stands for Jean-Baptiste (John the Baptist)

How does this stand as a Non-E ?
 

Bea Kiddo

Crusader
Hey everyone,

Every once in a while I get PM's about someone who was there or who knew me and had/has a different perception of what happened. I am sorry for offending anyone. The story is told as I remember it. I don't mean to assert my rightness about anything in this story. It's just how I saw things.

If I seemed cold or indifferent, maybe I was.

When I left the SO, I was a very angry person, easily set off.

It has taken me YEARS to calm down. And I am not saying I am perfect. But I am a different person. Even from how I wrote this story. I have weakened in some areas, and toughened up in others.

It's written from how I felt and how I perceived things during a certain time period.

I am unaware of using any "case data" in my story. Mine maybe, but not others. If I did, I am sorry. Not intentional.

Though I admit, my current standpoint in regards to Scn is pretty clear to me, and has been for years:

I am not a Scientologist, I am not an indy Scnist either. I don't hold or abhor any Scn beliefs. I cannot tolerate Scientologese converstaions, so I do not really associate with people who want to use the tech to fix things, in any degree. Live and let live.

But if you use the tech and the words, don't expect me to be your best friend.

-----

I have moved on. I have a WONDERFUL and LOVING husband. And a baby on the way (5 1/2 months preggos - a girl).

If anyone needs help, I will help. With an ear, a place to stay (in Texas), however I can, to get people free to decided for themselves.

------

I believe in god (either up there, or in me), but not religion.

Sorry (and not sorry) for those I offend.
 

Magoo

Gold Meritorious Patron
:bighug:

To you, Bea kiddo, and everyone who needs a big hug (which is most of us :)

Love you,

Tory/Magoo
 

HappyGirl

Gold Meritorious Patron
Bump for new readers.
And old readers. :) Bea, I just want to say I loved you since I first read your story. I just never posted on any of your threads before. I was just wondering if you had your baby when this thread got bumped, so I thought I would take the opportunity now to say: :hug:

Will yours be the first ESMB baby?
 

Zinjifar

Silver Meritorious Sponsor
maybe I'm too hardened the fuck up :)

I always thought Bea was just a sweety

course, I never had her as a *senior* :)....

Zinj
 
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