Free to shine
Shiny & Free
From Larry Brennan on OCMB http://ocmb.xenu.net/ocmb/viewtopic.php?p=355823#355823
-----------------------------------
FYI – this post contains OT III information. Stop reading here if you don’t want to see it.
In celebration of DM Lite (little Tommy Davis) confirming that the OT III/Xenu stuff was indeed part of scientology scripture, some on an Anonymous board decided to take action to share this wondrous news to the world at large.
So that people from many diverse walks of life can better understand this scientology creation story/OT III story, arrangements have been made to provide the OT III story in different dialects. As well, arrangements have been made to have famous people who have unique speaking and/or writing styles tell the story in their own words so as to reach the widest possible audience..
Details, including the writers such as the incredible authors of “Valley Girl”, “British Lord” and “Shakespear” below, can be found on WWP at the following link: http://tinyurl.com/cwcbsb
Following are a few examples from that link:
(I) First of all, here is Hubbard’s own writing on the subject (fair use quote):
Hubbard:
"The head of the Galactic Confederation (76 planets around larger stars visible from here) (founded 95,000,000 yrs ago, very space opera) solved overpopulation (250 billion or so per planet -- 178 billion on average) by mass implanting. He caused people to be brought to Teegeeack (Earth) and put an H Bomb on the principal volcanoes (Incident 2) and then the Pacific area ones were taken in boxes to Hawaii and the Atlantic Area ones to Las Palmas and there "packaged." His name was Xenu. He used renegades. Various misleading data by means of circuits etc. was placed in the implants. When through with his crime Loyal Officers (to the people) captured him after 6 years of battle and put him in an electronic mountain trap where he still is. "They" are gone. The place (Confed.) has since been a desert".
(II) Examples of OT III Explained in different dialects:
IIa. OT III Explained in “Valley Girl”:
So this guy, who like ruled the Galactic Confederation, which was, uh, 76 planets or whatever around these really huuuge stars you can see from right here, and founded like 95,000,000 yrs ago (totally space opera. Yeah) And he solved overpopulation of like 250 billion or whatever per planet, I mean, no way, right? by mass implanting, (which by the way is OMG sooo totally gross. Implantation? Gag me with a spoon).
So this dude caused people to be brought to like, Teegeeack, which is like the retard name for Earth or something, and put an H Bomb on some volcanoes, which supposedly is Incident II but ya know, I'm like, whatever. And then the Pacific area ones were like taken in boxes to Hawaii or something, and the Atlantic Area ones to like, Las Palmas and "packaged." His name was Xenu or some geek shit like that, and he used renegades.
And this misleading data or whatever, by means of circuits and all? Yeah? Was like totally placed in the implants. When he was done with the whole 'crime' thing, these Loyal Officer dorks, not loyal to him, duh, but to the people, right? Anyway, they captured him after like 6 years of battle or something and put him in an electronic mountain trap where he still is. "They're" like gone. And now the place is just totally a desert or whatever, and I mean whatever. And they call me a space cadet. OMG.
- copyright by Anonymous
IIb. OT III Explained in Ebonics:
Duh head uh duh Galactic Confederation (76 planets around larga stas visible from here) (founded 95,000,000 yrs ago, very space opera) solved overpopulation (250 billion o' so pa planet -- 178 billion on average) by mass implanting. He caused peeps to be brought to Teegeeack (Earf) an' put a H Bomb on duh principal volcanoes (Incident 2) an' then duh Pacific area ones be taken in boxes to Hawaii an' duh Atlantic Area ones to Las Palmas an' day "packaged." His name be Xenu. He used renegades. Various misleadin' data by means uh circuits etc. be placed in duh implants. When frough wif his crime Loyal Officas (to duh peeps) captured him afta 6 yeas uh battle an' put him in a electronic mountain trap where he still be. "They" be gone. Duh place (Confed.) gots since been a desert.
IIc. OT III Explained by a British Lord:
My Lords, many of you will have heard some form of the following anecdote, which I believe has previously been dramatised in a number of venues, including the well-known comedy animation from our chums across the pond, South Park. It is a piece unlikely to win a Hugo or Nebula award, so I preface these remarks by begging the indulgence of my noble and learned auditors.
As the right honourable ladies and gentlemen may be aware, the story concerns the 'Galactic Confederation', an venerable organisation founded around 95 million years ago. Some may question the extent to which this narrative corresponds to the accepted scientific viewpoint on history; however, I fear that such deconstruction is fruitless at best. Returning to the res; the Confederation spanned 76 planets that, it appears, orbit a number of large stars that are visible to the naked eye from the Earth's surface - although I fear that I cannot recommend a latitude and longitude from which to make such an observation.
(Titters from the peanut gallery)
It appears that the ruler of this Confederation, faced with the issue of overpopulation - a total of 250 billion inhabitants on each planet, rather confusingly summarised as 178 billion inhabitants on average (but I suppose with such, ahahaha, astronomical numbers, one need not dwell on the details) - chose to solve the issue through a process known as 'mass implanting'. Large groups were brought to Earth, at the time referred to as 'Teegeeack'. Several volcanoes were attacked via nuclear strikes. Captives destined for the Pacific area were taken to Hawaii, and those destined for the Atlantic region were transported to Las Palmas, at which destinations each group were "packaged", regarding which process, alas, little detail is provided within the scope of this narrative. The name of this individual was Xenu, and it appears he operated through what in our time would perhaps be known as insurgents, as well as the use of what might today be referred to as psyops, or rather more colloquially, 'pulling the wool over one's eyes' via disseminated or 'implanted' disinformation.
Following this, a series of violent altercations took place between Xenu and a number of individuals collectively self-identifying as 'Loyal Officers', which is to say, essentially a rebel militia. Eventually, he was captured and sentenced to life imprisonment in what is rather inadequately described as an 'electronic mountain trap', in which gaol we are given to believe he languishes even today. The militia are of course, even within the scope of this fantastic narrative, long since reduced to dust. Indeed, according to the myth, the location in question has itself undergone a process of desertification.
- copyright by Anonymous
III. Examples of OT III explained by famous personalities:
IIIa. OT III Explained by Shakespear:
Lord Xenu was the fell king's name, and with heart as black as coal
He killed and oppressed the multitude, with implants of the soul.
Five billion souls -no stop, t'was more, it verily was six-
Were killed by wicked cunning and within their minds were fixed
False visions, hallucinations, of Christ and other things
Which brought the souls confusion, and the pain confusion brings.
But lo, Lord Xenu's evil plot had scarcely just begun
When loyal Galactic Officers came, and blotted out the sun.
For lengthy, bloody years did the factions wage their war.
When Xenu was defeated, into a mountain they did bore
A hole, a trap, a cage for Xenu, lacking window or door
A prison for the evil lord to be confined for evermore.
And thus does our story end, and Xenu in that mountain doth dwell.
So listen, Scientologist, listen and listen well.
For never was there a tale more askew
Than that of Hubbard and his fair Xenu.
- copyright by Havok
IIIb. OT III Explained by Elmer Fudd:
De head of the Gawactic Confedewation (76 pwanets awound wawgew staws visibwe fwom hewe) (founded 95,000,000 yws ago, vewy space opewa) sowved ovewpopuwation (250 biwwion ow so pew pwanet -- 178 biwwion on avewage) by mass impwanting. He caused peopwe to be bwought to Teegeeack (Eawth) and put an H Bomb on the pwincipaw vowcanoes (Incident 2) and then the Pacific awea ones wewe taken in boxes to Hawaii and the Atwantic Awea ones to Was Pawmas and thewe "packaged." His name was Xenu. He used wenegades. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! Vawious misweading data by means of ciwcuits etc. was pwaced in the impwants. When thwough wif his cwime Woyaw Officews (to the peopwe) captuwed him aftew 6 yeaws of battwe and put him in an ewectwonic mountain twap whewe he stiww is. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! "Dey" awe gone. De pwace (Confed.) has since been a desewt.
IIIc. OT III Explained by the Swedish Chef:
Zee heed ooff zee Gelecteec Cunffedereshun (76 plunets eruoond lerger sters feesible-a frum here-a) (fuoonded 95,000,000 yrs egu, fery spece-a oopera) sulfed ooferpupooleshun (250 beelliun oor su per plunet -- 178 beelliun oon eferege-a) by mess implunteeng. He-a coosed peuple-a tu be-a bruooght tu Teegeeeck (Iert) und poot un H Bumb oon zee preencipel fulcunues (Inceedent 2) und zeen zee Peceeffic erea oones vere-a tekee in buxes tu Heveeei und zee Etlunteec Erea oones tu Les Pelmes und zeere-a "peckeged. Bork bork bork!" Hees neme-a ves Xenu. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp! He-a used renegedes. Um gesh dee bork, bork! Fereeuoos meesleeding deta by meuns ooff curcooeets itc. ves pleced in zee implunts. Um gesh dee bork, bork! Vhee thruoogh veet hees creeme-a Luyel Ooffffeecers (tu zee peuple-a) ceptoored heem effter 6 yeers ooff bettle-a und poot heem in un ilectruneec muoonteeen trep vhere-a he-a steell is. Um gesh dee bork, bork! "Zeey" ere-a gune-a. Zee plece-a (Cunffed. Bork bork bork!) hes seence-a beee a desert. Um de hur de hur de hur.
Anyway, many more great examples such as OT III in Pirate Speak, LOLCAT, Engrish, Southern, Scottish, Australian, Scriptkiddian, Bostonian, Yoda, Piglatin, Jive and Cockney can be found at the above noted link on WWP.
Let the joyous news be spread in all tongues and dialects around the world!
This is SERIOUS stuff!!!!
Amirite?
SME
_________________
My blog: http://larrybren.blogspot.com/
-----------------------------------
FYI – this post contains OT III information. Stop reading here if you don’t want to see it.
In celebration of DM Lite (little Tommy Davis) confirming that the OT III/Xenu stuff was indeed part of scientology scripture, some on an Anonymous board decided to take action to share this wondrous news to the world at large.
So that people from many diverse walks of life can better understand this scientology creation story/OT III story, arrangements have been made to provide the OT III story in different dialects. As well, arrangements have been made to have famous people who have unique speaking and/or writing styles tell the story in their own words so as to reach the widest possible audience..
Details, including the writers such as the incredible authors of “Valley Girl”, “British Lord” and “Shakespear” below, can be found on WWP at the following link: http://tinyurl.com/cwcbsb
Following are a few examples from that link:
(I) First of all, here is Hubbard’s own writing on the subject (fair use quote):
Hubbard:
"The head of the Galactic Confederation (76 planets around larger stars visible from here) (founded 95,000,000 yrs ago, very space opera) solved overpopulation (250 billion or so per planet -- 178 billion on average) by mass implanting. He caused people to be brought to Teegeeack (Earth) and put an H Bomb on the principal volcanoes (Incident 2) and then the Pacific area ones were taken in boxes to Hawaii and the Atlantic Area ones to Las Palmas and there "packaged." His name was Xenu. He used renegades. Various misleading data by means of circuits etc. was placed in the implants. When through with his crime Loyal Officers (to the people) captured him after 6 years of battle and put him in an electronic mountain trap where he still is. "They" are gone. The place (Confed.) has since been a desert".
(II) Examples of OT III Explained in different dialects:
IIa. OT III Explained in “Valley Girl”:
So this guy, who like ruled the Galactic Confederation, which was, uh, 76 planets or whatever around these really huuuge stars you can see from right here, and founded like 95,000,000 yrs ago (totally space opera. Yeah) And he solved overpopulation of like 250 billion or whatever per planet, I mean, no way, right? by mass implanting, (which by the way is OMG sooo totally gross. Implantation? Gag me with a spoon).
So this dude caused people to be brought to like, Teegeeack, which is like the retard name for Earth or something, and put an H Bomb on some volcanoes, which supposedly is Incident II but ya know, I'm like, whatever. And then the Pacific area ones were like taken in boxes to Hawaii or something, and the Atlantic Area ones to like, Las Palmas and "packaged." His name was Xenu or some geek shit like that, and he used renegades.
And this misleading data or whatever, by means of circuits and all? Yeah? Was like totally placed in the implants. When he was done with the whole 'crime' thing, these Loyal Officer dorks, not loyal to him, duh, but to the people, right? Anyway, they captured him after like 6 years of battle or something and put him in an electronic mountain trap where he still is. "They're" like gone. And now the place is just totally a desert or whatever, and I mean whatever. And they call me a space cadet. OMG.
- copyright by Anonymous
IIb. OT III Explained in Ebonics:
Duh head uh duh Galactic Confederation (76 planets around larga stas visible from here) (founded 95,000,000 yrs ago, very space opera) solved overpopulation (250 billion o' so pa planet -- 178 billion on average) by mass implanting. He caused peeps to be brought to Teegeeack (Earf) an' put a H Bomb on duh principal volcanoes (Incident 2) an' then duh Pacific area ones be taken in boxes to Hawaii an' duh Atlantic Area ones to Las Palmas an' day "packaged." His name be Xenu. He used renegades. Various misleadin' data by means uh circuits etc. be placed in duh implants. When frough wif his crime Loyal Officas (to duh peeps) captured him afta 6 yeas uh battle an' put him in a electronic mountain trap where he still be. "They" be gone. Duh place (Confed.) gots since been a desert.
IIc. OT III Explained by a British Lord:
My Lords, many of you will have heard some form of the following anecdote, which I believe has previously been dramatised in a number of venues, including the well-known comedy animation from our chums across the pond, South Park. It is a piece unlikely to win a Hugo or Nebula award, so I preface these remarks by begging the indulgence of my noble and learned auditors.
As the right honourable ladies and gentlemen may be aware, the story concerns the 'Galactic Confederation', an venerable organisation founded around 95 million years ago. Some may question the extent to which this narrative corresponds to the accepted scientific viewpoint on history; however, I fear that such deconstruction is fruitless at best. Returning to the res; the Confederation spanned 76 planets that, it appears, orbit a number of large stars that are visible to the naked eye from the Earth's surface - although I fear that I cannot recommend a latitude and longitude from which to make such an observation.
(Titters from the peanut gallery)
It appears that the ruler of this Confederation, faced with the issue of overpopulation - a total of 250 billion inhabitants on each planet, rather confusingly summarised as 178 billion inhabitants on average (but I suppose with such, ahahaha, astronomical numbers, one need not dwell on the details) - chose to solve the issue through a process known as 'mass implanting'. Large groups were brought to Earth, at the time referred to as 'Teegeeack'. Several volcanoes were attacked via nuclear strikes. Captives destined for the Pacific area were taken to Hawaii, and those destined for the Atlantic region were transported to Las Palmas, at which destinations each group were "packaged", regarding which process, alas, little detail is provided within the scope of this narrative. The name of this individual was Xenu, and it appears he operated through what in our time would perhaps be known as insurgents, as well as the use of what might today be referred to as psyops, or rather more colloquially, 'pulling the wool over one's eyes' via disseminated or 'implanted' disinformation.
Following this, a series of violent altercations took place between Xenu and a number of individuals collectively self-identifying as 'Loyal Officers', which is to say, essentially a rebel militia. Eventually, he was captured and sentenced to life imprisonment in what is rather inadequately described as an 'electronic mountain trap', in which gaol we are given to believe he languishes even today. The militia are of course, even within the scope of this fantastic narrative, long since reduced to dust. Indeed, according to the myth, the location in question has itself undergone a process of desertification.
- copyright by Anonymous
III. Examples of OT III explained by famous personalities:
IIIa. OT III Explained by Shakespear:
Lord Xenu was the fell king's name, and with heart as black as coal
He killed and oppressed the multitude, with implants of the soul.
Five billion souls -no stop, t'was more, it verily was six-
Were killed by wicked cunning and within their minds were fixed
False visions, hallucinations, of Christ and other things
Which brought the souls confusion, and the pain confusion brings.
But lo, Lord Xenu's evil plot had scarcely just begun
When loyal Galactic Officers came, and blotted out the sun.
For lengthy, bloody years did the factions wage their war.
When Xenu was defeated, into a mountain they did bore
A hole, a trap, a cage for Xenu, lacking window or door
A prison for the evil lord to be confined for evermore.
And thus does our story end, and Xenu in that mountain doth dwell.
So listen, Scientologist, listen and listen well.
For never was there a tale more askew
Than that of Hubbard and his fair Xenu.
- copyright by Havok
IIIb. OT III Explained by Elmer Fudd:
De head of the Gawactic Confedewation (76 pwanets awound wawgew staws visibwe fwom hewe) (founded 95,000,000 yws ago, vewy space opewa) sowved ovewpopuwation (250 biwwion ow so pew pwanet -- 178 biwwion on avewage) by mass impwanting. He caused peopwe to be bwought to Teegeeack (Eawth) and put an H Bomb on the pwincipaw vowcanoes (Incident 2) and then the Pacific awea ones wewe taken in boxes to Hawaii and the Atwantic Awea ones to Was Pawmas and thewe "packaged." His name was Xenu. He used wenegades. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! Vawious misweading data by means of ciwcuits etc. was pwaced in the impwants. When thwough wif his cwime Woyaw Officews (to the peopwe) captuwed him aftew 6 yeaws of battwe and put him in an ewectwonic mountain twap whewe he stiww is. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! "Dey" awe gone. De pwace (Confed.) has since been a desewt.
IIIc. OT III Explained by the Swedish Chef:
Zee heed ooff zee Gelecteec Cunffedereshun (76 plunets eruoond lerger sters feesible-a frum here-a) (fuoonded 95,000,000 yrs egu, fery spece-a oopera) sulfed ooferpupooleshun (250 beelliun oor su per plunet -- 178 beelliun oon eferege-a) by mess implunteeng. He-a coosed peuple-a tu be-a bruooght tu Teegeeeck (Iert) und poot un H Bumb oon zee preencipel fulcunues (Inceedent 2) und zeen zee Peceeffic erea oones vere-a tekee in buxes tu Heveeei und zee Etlunteec Erea oones tu Les Pelmes und zeere-a "peckeged. Bork bork bork!" Hees neme-a ves Xenu. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp! He-a used renegedes. Um gesh dee bork, bork! Fereeuoos meesleeding deta by meuns ooff curcooeets itc. ves pleced in zee implunts. Um gesh dee bork, bork! Vhee thruoogh veet hees creeme-a Luyel Ooffffeecers (tu zee peuple-a) ceptoored heem effter 6 yeers ooff bettle-a und poot heem in un ilectruneec muoonteeen trep vhere-a he-a steell is. Um gesh dee bork, bork! "Zeey" ere-a gune-a. Zee plece-a (Cunffed. Bork bork bork!) hes seence-a beee a desert. Um de hur de hur de hur.
Anyway, many more great examples such as OT III in Pirate Speak, LOLCAT, Engrish, Southern, Scottish, Australian, Scriptkiddian, Bostonian, Yoda, Piglatin, Jive and Cockney can be found at the above noted link on WWP.
Let the joyous news be spread in all tongues and dialects around the world!
This is SERIOUS stuff!!!!
Amirite?
SME
_________________
My blog: http://larrybren.blogspot.com/
Toooooo FUNNY! 
Thankyou Larry!
