TECH BREAKTHROUGH! Why your BT's are still haunting your ass!

HelluvaHoax!

Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
For Goodness sake HH. You really need everything spelled out. It should be so obvious.It's like this. The tone level of an individual is determined by his theta endowment and the amount of free theta available to him. When an individual with a large amount of theta endowment has a high volume of free theta he raises the tone level of the beings in his environment by his presence alone. Surely you've heard this before. It's basic Science of Survival theta mest theory turn water into wine tech.Anyway, so as you free BTs you increase your own free theta and depending upon your own theta endowment raise the tone of your sphere if influence and also one could assume that the newly released BTs may have been holding down the tone of some range of influence and so by being "handled" are no longer holding down the tone level of their sphere of influence. We will not go so far as to speculate that newly keyed out BTs would have enough theta endowment to actually raise the tone of a zone or sphere of influence. That is just absurd. So basically every person on the level is doing his part to raise the tone level of the planet and of course as this occurs some sane decisions might start ramdomly occuring. It would be reasonable for OTs who are diligently working on the level by getting in session at least three times per day and arriving for their mandatory refreshers and participating in the OT ambassador program to take responsibility for the effects they are creating. This would obviously include the fall of the wall and the success of each of the American Idol contestants and the lack of psychiatry in the Dominican Republic. (to name a few)I hope this clarifies for you what is so obvious to the rest of us.

Good Twin......Thanks but--OhhhhhHellllllll!! I am so embarrassed!!

All this time I thought the freed BT's went on mission to Germany and made the Wall Fall.

Now you tell me that it was MY freed theta that went to Berlin.

This is humiliating. But, at the same time I am really pissed off because--

Do you have any idea at all how much time it took me to write hundreds of thousand of individual COMMENDATION REPORTS on each of my blown BTs for handling that wall? Just creating their ethics folders, alone, cost a fortune! I just hate it when a BT takes credit for something that I did myself! Now I am going to KR every one of those out-exchange little bastards!
 
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G

Gottabrain

Guest
THE MOST HILARIOUS INSIDE JOKES OF ALL TIME

OH HH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:thumbsup::D:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::thankyou::party::heartflower::rose::grouphug::bwahaha::bwahaha::bwahaha::bwahaha::bwahaha:

:thewave:

:thewinner:

You are absolutely the friggin BEST.

This is top notch stuff, mate. I can't friggin stop LAUGHING!!!!!

You ought to contact Robin Williams. You should be writing for him, mate.

I can't get enough of this!!! You ought to patent it!!!
 

Rmack

Van Allen Belt Sunbather
OH HH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:thumbsup::D:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::thankyou::party::heartflower::rose::grouphug::bwahaha::bwahaha::bwahaha::bwahaha::bwahaha:

:thewave:

:thewinner:

You are absolutely the friggin BEST.

This is top notch stuff, mate. I can't friggin stop LAUGHING!!!!!

You ought to contact Robin Williams. You should be writing for him, mate.

I can't get enough of this!!! You ought to patent it!!!

an lol would have been enough.....
 
G

Gottabrain

Guest
WOW, GT! It worked! I got my first BT to blow!!!

BT SUCCESS STORY

I have been stuck on a helluva homo sapiens for so damn long I had just given up hope of ever escaping. Then, Ron's new BlowTech was released it read on "Hell No We Won't Go!"

OMG! I thought all these tens of thousands of BTs I was hanging out with were part of a Vietnam War Protest!

Once I realized that, I stopped chanting "Hell No We Won't Go!" and started my Leaving Routing Form! This is sooo amazing. They said that once I get Sec Checks and pay off my Freeloader Bill I am free to go!!!

Thanks to my auditor and Ron, BT's Greatest Friend!

OH MY GOD I AM GOING TO DIE LAUGHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

Good twin

Floater


Good Twin......Thanks but--OhhhhhHellllllll!! I am so embarrassed!!

All this time I thought the freed BT's went on mission to Germany and made the Wall Fall.

Now you tell me that it was MY freed theta that went to Berlin.

This is humiliating. But, at the same time I am really pissed off because--

Do you have any idea at all how much time it took me to write hundreds of thousand of individual COMMENDATION REPORTS on each of my blown BTs for handling that wall? Just creating their ethics folders, alone, cost a fortune! I just hate it when a BT takes credit for something that I did myself! Now I am going to KR every one of those out-exchange little bastards!

That's exactly how Rockslammer described them when he got back from L.A. after doing his OT5. I remember it clear as day "Damn those out-exchange little bastards. They used up my forty thousand dollars". I had no idea what he was talking about at the time.
 

lkwdblds

Crusader
Your ability to come up with new variations is wild!

No, trust me, all this rowdy laughter is ruining your eternity.

There should be no laughing inside of Scientology Church whilst reading holy scripture.

There should be no laughing outside of Scientology Church without an approved CSW.

In general, laughing is not really a laughing matter. Laughter is a deadly serious activity.

"The entire agonizing future of this Message Board - and every man, woman and child posting on it - and their destinies for the next billions of posts depend on what you do here and now in ESMB . This is a deadly serious activity. And if we fail to get out of this thread now, then perhaps we will never have another chance." (L. Ron Hoaxard)

Helluva - I noticed this thread was getting lots of reponses. Badly in need of some humor, I took a look. What a riot! You remind me of a great musical composer, you have the ability to endlessly create endless variations on your various themes. One new twist after another. You are the absolute Master of your genre. Everyone has heard of a "TOAST MASTER", I hereby dub you with the title of "HOAX Master" and in German speaking countries, you will be known as "DER HOAXENMEISTER"!
Lakey
 

HelluvaHoax!

Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Helluva - I noticed this thread was getting lots of reponses. Badly in need of some humor, I took a look. What a riot! You remind me of a great musical composer, you have the ability to endlessly create endless variations on your various themes. One new twist after another. You are the absolute Master of your genre. Everyone has heard of a "TOAST MASTER", I hereby dub you with the title of "HOAX Master" and in German speaking countries, you will be known as "DER HOAXENMEISTER"!
Lakey

Lakester, many thx! In preparation for the award ceremony where I am officially given these titles, I have commissioned COB's writer to work up a little acceptance speech. Here's a tiny preview...

"....which is to say that people in not less than 243 countries worldwide will be reading the words of Der Hoaxenmeister translated into their own languages so that just for starters they can instantly apply nothing less than pure, 100% standard Hoax Technology and that is just another way of saying they are on the road to achieving advanced states beyond all of their wildest expectations and dreams for a time that is, yes, even beyond all of eternity!"

The video portion is coming along pretty well, too. In the first 30 seconds we have 100 exploding volcano graphs all reaching highest-evers simultaneously and this seamlessly transitions into a re-release of the Hoax Basics.

Can I confirm you will be at the event?

(PS: We don't have a date yet for the event because the speechwriter is in cramming getting M9 on his own speech. It seems that even he doesn't know exactly what it means).
 

lkwdblds

Crusader


Lakester, many thx! In preparation for the award ceremony where I am officially given these titles, I have commissioned COB's writer to work up a little acceptance speech. Here's a tiny preview...

"....which is to say that people in not less than 243 countries worldwide will be reading the words of Der Hoaxenmeister translated into their own languages so that just for starters they can instantly apply nothing less than pure, 100% standard Hoax Technology and that is just another way of saying they are on the road to achieving advanced states beyond all of their wildest expectations and dreams for a time that is, yes, even beyond all of eternity!"

Does the World actually have that many countries, 243? If not, you may have to create a new country HOAX Land.

The video portion is coming along pretty well, too. In the first 30 seconds we have 100 exploding volcano graphs all reaching highest-evers simultaneously and this seamlessly transitions into a re-release of the Hoax Basics.

That's good news, stats will be up then so our request for a day off must be granted. Here's a tip to make some money. Rent an aparment complex near the event, will that be held on Teegeeack or Helatrobus. Anyway which ever place it is held, you can make a killing renting out apartments to all those in town for the event at jacked up rental prices.!

Can I confirm you will be at the event?

I'll be there as long as I don't have to catch a flight on one of those rickity DC 9's that makes the 400 light year journey back to Galactic Headquarters near the North Star. The DC 9 has logged too many miles on it, continuously making the 800 light year round trip for over 75 milliion years. On the other hand, I am thinking about all those frequent flyer miles I may receive, hmm to make the trip or not, that is the question. I think one of the wings is about to fall off. That reminds me, why does a space vehicle have wings in the first place?

(PS: We don't have a date yet for the event because the speechwriter is in cramming getting M9 on his own speech. It seems that even he doesn't know exactly what it means).

Well, perhaps he is translating it into the wrong language. I recommend the event be carried on in Jabberwocky with English subtitles. You know, "Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimball in the wabe..... I think that means, "I have to use the restroom."

HOAXENMEISTER, Be sure and announce the date and the place where the event will be held!
Lakey
 

Rmack

Van Allen Belt Sunbather
Well, perhaps he is translating it into the wrong language. I recommend the event be carried on in Jabberwocky with English subtitles. You know, "Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimball in the wabe..... I think that means, "I have to use the restroom."

HOAXENMEISTER, Be sure and announce the date and the place where the event will be held!
Lakey

Now your talkin' my language!
 

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Hatshepsut

Crusader
For Goodness sake HH. You really need everything spelled out. It should be so obvious.

It's like this. The tone level of an individual is determined by his theta endowment and the amount of free theta available to him. When an individual with a large amount of theta endowment has a high volume of free theta he raises the tone level of the beings in his environment by his presence alone.

Surely you've heard this before. It's basic Science of Survival theta mest theory turn water into wine tech.

Anyway, so as you free BTs you increase your own free theta and depending upon your own theta endowment raise the tone of your sphere if influence and also one could assume that the newly released BTs may have been holding down the tone of some range of influence and so by being "handled" are no longer holding down the tone level of their sphere of influence. We will not go so far as to speculate that newly keyed out BTs would have enough theta endowment to actually raise the tone of a zone or sphere of influence. That is just absurd.

So basically every person on the level is doing his part to raise the tone level of the planet and of course as this occurs some sane decisions might start ramdomly occuring. It would be reasonable for OTs who are diligently working on the level by getting in session at least three times per day and arriving for their mandatory refreshers and participating in the OT ambassador program to take responsibility for the effects they are creating. This would obviously include the fall of the wall and the success of each of the American Idol contestants and the lack of psychiatry in the Dominican Republic. (to name a few)

I hope this clarifies for you what is so obvious to the rest of us.

:dieslaughing::hysterical::roflmao: "...the fall of the wall?" Which wall? Is the Wall of Fire due to crumble any day now? Oy vey. :omg:
 

HelluvaHoax!

Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Shame on you Helluva Hoax, your Solo CSing.

:D
Hey Searcher Again...that is a most fascinating post that resonates well beyond the humor!

After reading that, it occurred to me that of ALL the skills that Scientology should want to give to a "freed operating thetan" the first would be the ability to C/S oneself so as to remain out of the trap.

But it is forbidden to self C/S because.....it denies income to the Church by making people self-sufficient.

Self-Sufficiency. That may well be the single greatest sin in Scientology.
 

Butterfly

Patron
:D :thumbsup:

Yeah lucky me! I got all the hot ones, :happydance: I could spare a few. But the Double Mint twins that give me daily massages are strictly off limits.
 
G

Gottabrain

Guest
...What did the cop say to the OT he pulled over for drunk driving?

Ok - which one of you is going to blow?
 
Can you imagine if some active Church Scio comes across this or some other thread of HH's? How do they deal with the joking?

In Scientology a person quickly learns that joking and degrading, in any form, about anything having to do with Hubbard, the Church, management, of DM, is so NOT appreciated or tolerated.

Any person in Scientology quickly learns to self-monitor and self-correct ones own thoughts and behavior. THAT aspect of the Scientology experience always fascinated me. To what amazing degree any Church member interiorizes the "external" control, and brings it "inside" to the point where one constantly monitors and corrects self on many levels. I don't mean this in any sense of "ethics", but as strange and weird control.

What happens to the poor soul who happens across a thread like this? He or she must get VERY uncomfortable. Especially if the slightest little laugh or giggle sneaks out past all of that inner self-corrective machinery Hubbard so well inserted into their consciousness and space. :omg:

Aw, it'll do 'em good! :thumbsup:
 
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